


a dwindling, mercurial high

by moonsongthemarauder



Series: we were something don't you think so? [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Album: folklore (Taylor Swift), Angst, Based on a Taylor Swift Song, Drama, Drama & Romance, F/M, Harry Potter Next Generation, Romance, Secret Relationship, Teen Romance, some secret relationship drama for scorose
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2020-09-23
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:28:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 24,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26447809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonsongthemarauder/pseuds/moonsongthemarauder
Summary: Rose couldn’t stop the lingering hope that Scorpius would decide to not keep their relationship private sooner rather than later.A story of how wanting to keep a relationship safe could end up being the cause of it's destruction.
Relationships: Scorpius Malfoy/Rose Weasley
Series: we were something don't you think so? [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1878040
Comments: 20
Kudos: 49





	1. born from just one single glance

**Author's Note:**

> Based on 'illicit affairs' from Taylor Swift's new album, folklore.

Rose stared at the words on the page, feeling her stomach turn as she read them over and over again. She had been looking at through the _Daily Prophet_ , pausing to glance through the obituary page when she saw the name she had hoped never to see on the page.

_Astoria Malfoy died on December 17 th, 2023. She leaves behind a husband, Draco, and a son, Scorpius. Astoria was best known for her charity work at St. Mungos…._

Rose stopped reading the page and stared at Scorpius’s name.

Despite the intense summer fling they had during August of that year, they had barely spoken to one another since the Hogwarts Express. Rose had thought he would go back to dating Mila, his on and off girlfriend of the past three years, but he hadn’t. Instead, they appeared to just remain friends.

Rose and Scorpius were still forced to see each other though. Potions, Charms, Transfiguration and Defense were all classes they shared, since they were the few who elected to take each one. So, although Rose wanted nothing more than to have space from him, she was forced to be in a classroom with him every day of the week. Rose tried her best not to look at him during that time, but sometimes couldn’t help but look at him as memories of being in his room would pass through her.

Rose would catch Scorpius staring at her sometimes too. While he was better when they were in class about keeping a low profile, when they were together in social situations, she had caught him looking her way with that same intense gaze he used to give her. He and Al still hung out a lot, which meant that sometimes Rose would be at a table in Three Broomsticks with Al, Graham, Layla, Inez and Scorpius.

Which meant that her and Scorpius would both avoid looking at each other but couldn’t help but have their eyes meet.

Although Rose tried not to watch him, she couldn’t help it. His mum had been sick for months and Rose knew that the prognosis wasn’t looking good. Despite herself, she worried about his mum and him. She remembered all the times when Scorpius had said how he didn’t know what to do when he lost his mum. She was watching his demeanor for some sign of how he was doing.

Which was why when he left Hogwarts three days before break was supposed to start, she had hoped it wasn’t because his mum had gotten worse. She had hoped that maybe, given the fact that his mother was sick he somehow got granted permission to leave early.

But given the paper in front of her, she knew that wasn’t the case.

“Oh dear,” Hermione said as she looked over Rose’s shoulder at the paper. “Draco’s wife died, Ron.”

“That’s awful,” Ron said. Although he did not get along with Mr. Malfoy, both he and Draco had reached a place where they didn’t wish harm on the awful. “Does it say if there will be a service?”

Rose handed the paper to her mum and her mum looked.

“Yes, December 30th,” Hermione said. “Ron do you think we should…”

Rose drowned her mother out, poking her oatmeal with her spoon.

She had a knot in her stomach and felt the tears coming on. While she hadn’t known Scorpius’s mum well, there were many times during that month her and Scorpius were together that they had tea with his mum. His mum was the only person who knew about them. While Rose’s friend Layla had her suspicions, Rose never confirmed them.

Rose closed her eyes, remembering when she realized that Astoria knew about her and Scorpius.

It had been a hot August day, and she and Scorpius were taking refuge at the Malfoy Manor, as they had their whole relationship. The large house allowed for total privacy in Scorpius’s room, as well as the lack of siblings or family members popping up at any moment. But they had made a habit of having tea with Scorpius’s mum. While Rose and Scorpius never told Astoria what their relationship was, Rose did notice that Scorpius was much more relaxed and therefore, affectionate during those teas than when they were with Al or anyone else.

On that hot day, Scorpius had put a hand on her shoulder, rubbing it softly while she drank tea and spoke with Astoria about Astoria’s charity work at the St. Mungo’s and if she had any suggestions for Rose, who wanted to be a healer.

“The interview is what I’m most nervous about,” Rose said. “They take so few apprentices into the program. While I could wait another year, I really want to just get started.”

Scorpius squeezed her shoulder. “You’ll get it, you just need to be confident. You have the grades and you’re calm in a crisis. Nothing else needed.”

“Well that’s good to hear your calm in a crisis,” Astoria said. “That will be a big help to your interview.”

“Her friend broke a glass and started bleeding last month and Rose didn’t even blink,” Scorpius said, his fingers tapping her back. “She’ll be an excellent Healer someday.”

“Oh Scorpius, you have to say that,” Astoria said with a grin. “That is the job of an adoring boyfriend to believe in their girlfriend.”

Rose flushed and Scorpius’s finger’s stilled on Rose’s back while they both stared at Astoria, clearly unsure how to respond to her words. Astoria though didn’t seem to worry.

“But that does make me happy to hear how good you are in a crisis,” Astoria said. “Scorpius, while he can do okay, is sometimes completely helpless in a crisis.”

“Hey!” Scorpius protested.

“Darling, I’m sorry, but your utter shut down after your rabbit died proved you don’t do well in a situation with a lot of emotions,” Astoria said, her eyes sliding back to Rose. “I’ll be glad to know that I’m leaving Scorpius with someone who can help him through those dark times after I’m gone.”

Back in the present day, Rose shut her eyes, Astoria’s words echoing in her head. Before she could even process what she was doing, she had stood up.

“I’m going to Layla’s,” Rose said, putting her oatmeal by the sink.

Hermione smiled up at her. “Alright honey. Tell her family hi.”

“Be safe love,” Ron said. “Be home before 9.”

Rose nodded and, almost in a daze, walked out to the Apparating line, disappearing before she stopped herself.

* * *

Rose stood outside of Scorpius’s room, taking a deep breath, trying to will herself the courage to knock.

Draco had let her in, although a part of Rose wondered if he knew he had. He hadn’t responded to anything she had said, just nodding and mumbling that Scorpius was upstairs before returning to a sitting room off of the entryway, which had many other adults all sitting there, looking sullen, flowers all around the room.

It was then that Rose realized she didn’t bring anything to try to comfort Scorpius. She realized that she didn’t even take her hair out of the scrunchie she had slept in and thanking Merlin that she was already dressed when she read the paper and avoided coming to Scorpius’s house in sweats with no bra.

Rose lifted her fist, starting to count to three, telling herself that then, she would knock.

However, she never got the chance too. Because right after she said _one_ in her head, the door flew open and standing there in front of her was Scorpius himself.

He looked confused to see her there, but Rose saw that there were dark bags under his eyes, his hair, normally neatly styled sticking up in all different directions, and his eyes full of sadness.

Rose wanted to hold him; all the feelings she had pushed away for nearly four months came rushing back as she stared at him.

She wasn’t able to work up the courage to reach out for him, though everything inside of her was screaming to. And she knew it wasn’t just because she was desperate for affection, but because she wanted to squeeze all the pain out of him and absorb it herself.

She had never seen him look so broken.

“Hi,” she said weakly. She felt herself start to tear up as she stared at him. “I’m-I’m sorry about your mum.”

Scorpius stared at her for a moment.

But before Rose knew it, his arms were around her, pulling her close and his head fell onto her shoulder. She wrapped her arms around his back, weaving one of his hands into his hair.

She pushed against him, that familiar feeling of never being close enough to him returning, as she tried to make sure that he was as close to her as humanly possible. She felt him start to shake and soon her shoulder was wet from his tears.

“I can’t believe she’s gone,” Scorpius whispered, his voice cracking.

Rose squeezed him tighter, unsure what to say, but that seemed to be what he needed, because he held on tighter to her as well.

* * *

Later, Rose and Scorpius lay on his bed, Rose combing her fingers through his hair. Scorpius lay on his side, facing her, while Rose was on her back.

“Have you been sleeping at all?” Rose asked him.

“No,” Scorpius replied. “I’ll get a little bit here and there but not consistently. Whenever I try to sleep, I just can’t stop thinking.”

“Have you tried a sleeping draught?”

“No,” Scorpius said. “I don’t want one.”

“Why not?” Rose asked curiously. “If you aren’t sleeping—”

“I’m thinking of my memories with Mum,” Scorpius said softly. “I can’t sleep because I’m replaying all the time I spent with her, trying to will it to my memory. It’s all I have left of her now.”

Rose nodded understandingly. While she knew she could have suggested a pensieve, she had the feeling Scorpius wouldn’t have been the most responsive to that idea now.

“Have you left your room at all?” Rose asked.

Scorpius closed his eyes for a second as Rose pushed his hair back.

“Not really,” Scorpius said, opening his eyes. “Mum’s friends and a bunch of family are downstairs but I don’t want to be there. It’s exhausting. Everyone is crying and asks how I am and I…I don’t want to be there right now.”

Rose nodded. “Has Declan come over? Or…or Mila?”

Scorpius noticed a flash of insecurity pass through Rose’s eyes at the mention of Mila’s name, but didn’t mention it to her.

“Declan has but I didn’t see him,” Scorpius said. “Mila wrote, asking if I wanted her to come over, but I told her no.”

“Why?” Rose asked. “Scorpius, you can’t just hole yourself up here by yourself.”

“I didn’t want to see Declan or Mila,” Scorpius said. He looked down, avoiding her eyes. “Honestly since she died, the only person I’ve wanted to see and talk to about it is you.”

Rose let out a small breath at his words.

“You could have written me,” she whispered. “I would have come.”

Scorpius looked back up at her, taking in her face. It had been so long since she had been this close to him. Her hair was up in a scrunchie that he knew she preferred to sleep in and her sweater was a flattering green.

His favorite color.

He wondered if she had worn it on purpose.

“I didn’t want you to come because you felt like you had to,” Scorpius said softly.

Rose turned onto her side, pushing herself closer to him. Scorpius’s gaze traveled down to her lips momentarily, before he reminded himself to look up. He knew that more than likely, she was here as a friend, nothing more.

“There’s nowhere else I would rather be right now,” Rose said quietly, staring at his chest. Her hands were still in his hair, a calming stroke, and her other hand came around to rub his back.

Scorpius, who had been trying to respect her boundaries since she had gotten there, finally gave into his urge to touch her. He wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her close to him and breathing in the smell of her hair.

“Rose…” Scorpius said, but he lost track of his train of thought.

“Just rest Scorp,” Rose said quietly. “I got you.”

And for the first time in the three days since his mother died, Scorpius fell fast asleep.

* * *

Scorpius woke up a few hours later, still holding Rose close to his chest, though she had turned over, her back to his chest now, reading a book.

Despite himself, he nuzzled closer to her, his nose breathing in her scent as he rested his face in the crook of her shoulder.

He had wanted to hold her like this for the last few months, ever since she told him they were just a summer fling and he belonged to Mila. Rose never realized that as soon as she had walked in on him sitting in her kitchen that he hadn’t been Mila’s. He quickly became Rose’s and planned on staying hers for a while.

She just decided she wasn’t his anymore.

Holding Rose like this, in his bed, he was reminded of all the time over the summer that was spent in positions just like this, typically after some snogging or fooling around. These were his favorite moments with Rose, where he could just hold her and breath her in, excitement for what was to come at Hogwarts for them.

But then she ended it and he still didn’t really understand why.

While Mila had wanted to get back together, he couldn’t. He had meant all that he said to Rose about their relationship; it was toxic and unhealthy. While they had loved each other and thought the other a good person, for some reason they couldn’t help having blown out fights and ending things before starting them up again when they were bored or, honestly, horny.

His mother had told him they had sex too young and too early in the relationship and that’s why so much changed. She said that when it’s right in a relationship, doing something like having sex shouldn’t cause issues, it just means that you have sex. She said told him that if he found himself not trusting the partner after that it may have been too soon.

While Scorpius didn’t know if he believed it completely, he definitely thought there was some merit to the cause. If only because when he and Rose had sex, nothing changed for them.

So, on the train to Hogwarts, he had told Mila that he didn’t want to get back together. She had looked so hopeful when they had first started talking and he could tell that while she held it together, that he was hurting her all over again.

When he walked out of the compartment and saw Rose, he had planned on telling her, but instead found himself going through a second breakup of the day.

And yet here she was in his arms again.

Lost in the memories of him and Rose, Scorpius placed a mindless kiss on her shoulder.

Rose immediately stiffened and Scorpius realized his mistake. While she was here and it felt like old times, it was definitely not. Rose pulled away from him slightly before looking back at him.

“Did you sleep?” she asked.

“Yeah,” Scorpius said. “Best sleep I’ve had the past few days.”

“Good,” Rose said. Rose bit her lip, conflicted about what to do next. “Well…I guess I should go.”

“Oh,” Scorpius said as disappointment filled him. “Okay.”

Rose got up from the bed, walking to where her shoes were discarded. Scorpius sat up moved to sit at the edge of the bed, watching her.

She was so beautiful. In a different way than Mila was. Mila was stunning, there was no doubt. But Rose’s beauty was quieter, more subtle. One was not better than the other, they were just different examples of what beauty could be.

Rose stood up when she got her shoes on, looking over at him.

“Do you have to go?” Scorpius asked her quietly.

“I…” Rose said. “I feel like I should.”

“Okay,” Scorpius said.

Rose looked at him, moving closer to him with a frown on her face.

“Why didn’t you want Mila here?”

Scorpius looked up at her, confused by her question.

“What?”

“Why didn’t you want Mila here?” Rose asked him. Scorpius could see her never ending curiosity eating her up. “You said that Mila asked if you wanted her here and you said no.”

“I already told you why,” Scorpius responded. “I didn’t want to talk to her. I only wanted to talk to you.”

Rose let out a frustrated sigh.

“But why?” Rose asked. “I don’t get it. You didn’t get back together with Mila at the start of the year and now you don’t want her here? But you wanted me here?”

“I think you answered your question,” Scorpius said. “I didn’t want her here because I wanted you here. I didn’t get back together with her, because I wanted you.”

Rose looked at him and he could tell she didn’t believe him. But she continued to move closer to him until she was right in front of him. Her eyes were down, her brows furrowed and he could tell that she was trying to process this.

“I wanted you,” Scorpius said lowly, his eyes moving to her lips. He felt grateful that she was looking at the ground so that he didn’t have to advert his gaze. “I told Mila that I didn’t want to get back together with her. That I had met someone else that I wanted to be with. But then you told me how this was just a summer thing and how I was hers.”

Scorpius reached out then, gently grabbing Rose’s waist and pulling her to him so that she stood between his legs.

“And Weasley, you couldn’t have been more wrong,” Scorpius said. “I’ve been yours since our first kiss, if not earlier.”

Rose looked up at him then, just one single glance of realization before they met in the middle.

Rose’s arms came around him, pushing herself into him as she always did when they kissed and Scorpius wrapped his arms around her, not believing that he was kissing her again.

And just like before, the constant high where he could forget that anything else was happening started. He was drunk on her and just wanted _more._

They fell back into the bed together, and suddenly it was like it was August all over again, as they explored each other for the first time in months.

* * *

Rose pulled her coat closer to her as she and her parents walked to the reception hall.

It was the day of Astoria’s Malfoy’s funeral. It was a nice affair, The Malfoy family hosting it at the Manor. Draco had looked completely grief stricken; his face sunken as if he hadn’t gotten any sleep in weeks. He spoke, his voice quiet and unwavering in emotion, but everyone could see him gulping whenever he reached a rough part of his speech, pausing to regain his emotions before continuing. He returned to his seat afterwards, keeping his eyes on the ground, barely even noticing when his mother’s hand touched his back when he sat.

Scorpius did not look much better. He had deep bags under his eyes and had looked pale the whole service. Like his father, he kept his emotions under control, although he chose not to speak. While Rose had been unable to visit him often due to the Christmas holiday, this was something they had discussed when she was able to see him.

“I don’t want to speak in front of all those people,” Scorpius said. “How I feel about my mother’s death and my goodbye to her is private. I don’t need to share it at an event full of people who I barley know especially when I’m sure the media will make its way in too.”

Rose understood his point and, he had been right. There were over 300 people in attendance of the funeral and a writer for the Daily Prophet had made their way into the Manor and there were more outside hoping for some sort of scoop.

“Rosie, we are going to say hi to Draco and Scorpius, do you want to come or grab us a table?” her dad asked her.

“I’ll come,” Rose said, observing where Scorpius and Malfoy stood with many people in line to meet them. Rose couldn’t help but gulp when she saw who was currently talking to them.

Mila and her family were standing in front of the Malfoys. Mila’s parents were speaking to Draco, while Mila spoke to Scorpius. While a knot formed in Rose’s stomach as she watched Scorpius and Mila interact, she was too far to realize that their conversation was one of two people who cared for each other’s wellbeing and nothing more.

Scorpius met Mila’s gaze when she and her family were next in line. Mila had first hugged his father and then came to stand in front of him with a caring gaze. She hadn’t hugged him, though Scorpius could tell that she had wanted to. Mila had always been the more affectionate one of them, but she had been working hard on maintaining the boundaries Scorpius set for them in the fall.

“Scorpius,” Mila said, her voice small. “I’m…I’m so sorry.”

“Thanks,” Scorpius grunted. He saw Mila bit her lip at his response and he had flashes of when they were together and he started being distant with her. He knew how hard it was for her when he shut himself down. “You can hug me if you want.”

“Are you sure?” Mila asked, taking a tiny step closer.

Scorpius nodded. “People I barley know have hugged me. If anything, I’d be grateful; would almost be like nothing has changed.”

Mila gave him a small smile before wrapping her arms around his neck and holding him closer. She was almost as tall as him, so he leaned down slightly, resting his chin on his shoulder.

“I am so sorry, Scorp,” Mila whispered in his ear. Scorpius heard her breath hitch slightly as she started to cry. “Your mum was so amazing.”

Scorpius couldn’t help but squeeze Mila slightly, in an effort to comfort her before they each released the other from the hug. Mila held onto his hand though, and Scorpius wasn’t sure if she was doing that for his comfort or her own.

“I appreciate you coming,” Scorpius said.

“I wouldn’t have missed it,” Mila said, looking at him in earnest. “I know things aren’t as they used to be with us but…I wouldn’t miss this.”

Scorpius felt such a wave of gratitude coming over him towards Mila.

He had treated her like garbage while they were dating. He had picked fights on purpose when he was frustrated with other things, blew her off to spend time with other people, and knew that things were over long before they ever actually broke up for good, simply because he didn’t want to be single and because, honestly, the sex was good.

Yet she was here at his mother’s funeral, wrote him several times checking in and asking what he needed, and her and her mother and brought food to make sure that he and his father hadn’t starved.

While Mila wasn’t perfect in their relationship either, Scorpius knew that few people would have done all that she had for him after all they had been through together.

“Thank you,” Scorpius said again quietly. “For coming, the food, always checking in on me…thank you so much.”

Mila squeezed his hand. “If you ever need to talk about anything, know I am always here.”

Scorpius nodded and Mila flashed him a bright smile before walking towards her parents who were waiting for her.

“Always such a sweet girl,” Draco said to Scorpius, clapping a hand on his shoulder. “Shame you two weren’t good together.”

Scorpius looked down the line and saw Rose a few people down the line, engrossed in a discussion with her parents. Scorpius felt his heart beat faster and his stomach tightened.

“It’s for the best,” Scorpius said. “There’s people out there who are better matches for us.”

Draco gave Scorpius a sad smile and squeezed his shoulder. “That’s what your mother always said about you two.”

Draco then went on to greet the next people in line and Scorpius snuck another glance at Rose.

His mother was right. There were better matches out there for him than Mila.

Scorpius was just grateful his mother had met someone better for him before she died.

* * *

“Come with me,” Scorpius whispered to Rose lowly, grabbing her hand and pulling her away from the reception room.

Rose had been standing by the food table, having escaped a conversation with a boring Ministry official who was trying to recruit her to work in their department.

Scorpius pulled her down the hall before opening a door and closing it behind her. She heard a lock turn and gave him a questioning look.

“For privacy,” Scorpius said. He walked forward, putting his hands on her face and kissing her.

Rose wrapped her arms around his neck, holding her close to him. Scorpius pulled back and rested his forehead against hers.

“Hi,” Scorpius whispered.

“Hi,” Rose said quietly. She snuck another quick peck. “How are you doing today?”

Scorpius let out a sigh and Rose stroked the hairs on the back of his neck.

“Today has been hard,” Scorpius admitted. “It’s bad enough that this happened but then having to talk to people about it…it just sucks. I know they mean well but the sad looks they give me make me feel worse.”

Rose nodded, understandingly. Scorpius’s eyes were closed.

“My dad and I didn’t want today to be like this,” Scorpius said softly. “We didn’t want it to be so sad. We wanted to be able to celebrate my mum’s life and her work and accomplishments…but mum’s family refused. Said it wasn’t right. Thought that if we focused on what she got done during her life we wouldn’t be focusing enough of the fact that she’s gone.” Scorpius shook his head. “They didn’t get that that is all my dad and I can think of right now. And for once we didn’t want to focus on the fact that she wasn’t here and wouldn’t be for the rest of our lives.”

Rose wasn’t sure what to say, so she held just kept stroking his hair.

“She’s never going to see me graduate,” Scorpius whispered. “She’ll never see me get married, or start my career or know my kids. Every day I think of new things that she won’t get to be a part of in the future and I just wanted today to celebrate her.”

The room was quiet around them, with the chatter from the reception barely audible. Rose wasn’t sure how long they stood there in silence, foreheads together, Rose stroking Scorpius’s hair, just breathing together but Rose knew that no matter what, it didn’t feel like long enough.

* * *

Scorpius and Rose saw each other two more times before they went back to Hogwarts. Just like in August of the year before, each visit was spent at Scorpius’s house because of the privacy it provided and the absolute beauty of the rooms.

Going back to Hogwarts, that privacy would be greatly missed. As Scorpius walked onto the Hogwarts Express, he realized it wasn’t just the privacy of the Manor to be with Rose that he would miss, but the privacy to not be ogled at by the public would be missed too.

Draco had brought Scorpius to the platform and they were immediately met with sad stares from other students who must have read what happened in the paper. While most people were trying to be respectful, with a few people stopping Draco to give their condolences, Draco and Scorpius were also able to see reporters and photographers standing at the end of the platform, cameras flashing as they said goodbye.

“Well, I guess I’ll see you in the paper tomorrow,” Draco said, casting a glare at the reporters.

“Guess so,” Scorpius said.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw a group of red heads enter the platform. He looked over and saw Rose and Al’s families enter at the same time. Rose caught Scorpius’s eye and gave him a smile, before her attention was pulled over by Rita Skeeter calling out her mum’s name.

Albus rolled his eyes, not giving them attention before heading over to where Scorpius and his dad stood.

“Hey Scorp! Nice to see you Mr. Malfoy,” Albus said with a smile.

“Albus,” Draco said, nodding at Al. “Alright, Scorpius, if you need anything, always write. I look forward to hearing how your season goes. Maybe I’ll see if I can come to a game.”

“Okay,” Scorpius said. “Make sure that you take care of yourself.”

“I always do,” Draco said, waving at them before walking off, head down to avoid pictures.

“Are you worried about him being without your mum?” Al asked him.

“Yeah, he hasn’t eaten much since—” Scorpius was forced to stop, unable to say the words. He bit his lip as emotion overtook him trying to force them away. He felt the knot that had been in his stomach since his mother died tighten up, something it only did when he was on the verge of a breakdown.

He had been trying not to think about the fact that his mum wasn’t here to say goodbye to him. This was the first time in all his time at Hogwarts that she hadn’t come to say goodbye.

“Hey Scorp!” Rose said, walking up to him with a smile, though concern filled her eyes.

And just like that, Scorpius felt a calm come over him. He looked at Rose, feeling the knot in his stomach start to undo itself as she got closer. She rested a hand on his arm for a moment.

“Are you okay?” she asked quietly.

“I will be,” Scorpius said back in a soft voice. He was about to move his hand into hers, something that had become a habit since they rekindled things between them, when Al broke his focus.

“Something going on with you two you want to share?” Al asked, looking at them with inquisitive eyes.

“We’re friends Al,” Rose said, removing her hand from Scorpius’s arm. He found that he missed it. “I’m just comforting my friend on what I’m sure is a hard day for him.”

Al looked between Scorpius and Rose; a disbelieving look on his face. He stared at Scorpius, almost as if asking him to confirm and Scorpius nodded.

“Sure,” Al said, and Scorpius could tell that Albus didn’t buy Rose’s words or his nod. “Well, we better get on the train because Rita is looking over at us and basically salivating. I’m sure she’s coming up with all kind of stories about this.”

They made their way onto the train and found an empty compartment. By midway through the journey to Hogwarts, they were joined by Layla, Graham, and Inez, all of whom seemed confused at first as to why Scorpius was sitting with Al and Rose. But then Inez broke the tension by telling them gossip she heard about a fourth year, which lead to everyone wondering how true her words were.

For the most part, sitting in the compartment with all of them was fine. Inez was hilarious, as he knew from the few times he hung out with her and Mila since they were cousins, Layla was sweet though she did send him a warning look, and Al was always good to hang out with. Graham, Scorpius could have done without, since Scorpius noticed the looks Graham kept throwing Rose’s way.

But best of all was the fact that Rose and him sat next to each other and with all the people squeezed into the compartment, Rose’s side was pushing against his and she kept sending him small smiles.

However, the calming energy he got from Rose always went away when he would look up and see Albus or Layla or both, looking at him, with frowns, as if knowing what was happening and knowing that it was a bad idea.

* * *

“And Rosie, here is your gift,” Graham said, handing her a small box while they sat by the fire.

Every year since second year, her, Graham, Inez and Layla had exchanged gifts the first night back from winter break. It had become a tradition after Inez had brought them all chocolate frogs in their first year. She said gift giving was a big deal in her family and while her friends didn’t have to get her anything, she would always get them something when they got back from winter holiday.

The next year, the other three made sure they had gifts for everyone as well. And since then, it had been a tradition.

So far, Rose had gotten a face serum from Inez that Inez said would help her with the occasional cystic break out Rose got (for which Rose was incredibly grateful) and Layla had gotten Rose a biography about the Healer who handled children’s illnesses. Rose was always grateful for Inez and Layla’s gifts, since Inez typically got her some sort of skincare or make up product that Rose needed but didn’t know what kind to buy while Layla always bought her books or supplies related to being a Healer.

Graham however was a wildcard.

He always bought the three of them random gifts that often had them wondering how much thought he put into their gifts. This year though, it appeared that he had actually found gifts that he thought each of them would like and got different things for each of them (a few times he got them all the same thing but in different colors). So far, he had gotten Layla omniolculars for when she watched Quidditch and Inez a wizard chess set, since she never had her own game.

Rose thought he also got Inez her own chess pieces because his chess pieces were starting to listen to Inez better than to Graham himself, since they appeared to appreciate the fact that she knew what she was doing, and thus they didn’t get destroyed.

“So far you’ve been doing pretty well,” Layla said with a grin at Graham. “You might actually be three for three this year on gifts.”

“We’ll see,” Graham said, with a nervous smile in Rose’s direction.

Rose opened the gift, a beautifully wrapped purple container, to see a bottle of something laying among the tissue paper. She lifted it up and read the label.

_Field of Flowers_

_A perfume that will transform you to a meadow full of flowers with the one you love._

“Did you get her perfume?” Inez asked, her voice having a strange tone that Rose couldn’t quite place.

“Yeah, it smelled nice and it just made me think of her,” Graham said, and Rose could feel his eyes on her.

“Oh,” Inez said, looking down at her chess pieces from him with a sad look on her face.

“What does it smell like, Rose?” Layla asked.

Rose sprayed some it in the center of the circle and was met with a pleasant and not to overpowering floral scent.

“That smells good!” Layla said. She smiled at Graham. “Graham, I think this year you did a good job with the gifts. So that makes you what, one for seven?”

“Ha ha,” Graham said, rolling his eyes at Layla before looking back at Rose. “Do you like it?”

“Yeah,” Rose said, smiling at Graham. “It smells nice, thank you very much.”

Graham sent her a bright smile and for some reason it made Rose feel uneasy.

“Well, I’m probably going to go to bed,” Rose said, gathering her gifts in her arms. “Inez, should I use the face serum tonight? I feel like I have a cystic pimple coming in from eating all the sweets over the holiday.”

“Yeah, you can,” Inez said, giving her a small smile. Rose couldn’t help but notice that Inez, typically so easily excitable especially when talking about one of her interests, seemed more muted now. “Just use it as a spot treatment and put it on where you feel the cyst. It should help with the pain and make the cyst shrink. If it doesn’t work though, I’ll get you something else.”

“I’m sure it will work,” Layla said in an encouraging voice. “You’re a skincare genius Inez. The world is just waiting for you to open your skincare apothecary.”

Inez smiled nervously before looking back down at her chess pieces.

“Graham, do you want to play me?” she asked with a hopeful look at Graham.

“Night guys,” Rose said with a wave.

Rose walked up to their dorm walking over to her bed and opened her trunk, grabbing her sleep shirt out before the door opened. Rose turned and saw Layla behind her.

“You’re not coming to bed, are you?” Rose asked. “It’s barely 10. I thought you said I was an elderly person for going to bed so early.”

“You are,” Layla said, fidgeting with her fingers. “I’m not going to bed, but I have to ask you something.”

“Okay,” Rose said, starting to get nervous. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything is fine. What I have to ask you I just…awkward,” Layla said, causing Rose to frown.

Nothing was awkward between them. Layla had guided Rose through her first period since she got it at school and didn’t want to ask a teacher when they were in first year. Since then, nothing was ever awkward enough to talk about.

Layla sat down on Rose’s bed next to Rose.

“You never told me if anything happened between you and Malfoy during summer,” Layla said slowly. “But I know something did. I didn’t push you though because I thought you’d tell me when you were ready and if anything, ever progressed far enough. I thought something would happen publicly between you two when we got back to Hogwarts but all of a sudden you two weren’t speaking and Malfoy would barely even look at you. I know we heard from Inez that Mila wanted to get back together with him and honestly, I thought he tossed you aside for her but then…he didn’t. They appear to just be friends and so, I was kind of confused.”

Layla looked at Rose, as if seeing if she was going to jump in, but Rose stayed silent, looking at Layla hoping her face remained neutral.

“You didn’t seem to want to talk about him at all so I didn’t ask and for the most part, things went back to normal,” Layla said. She gulped, taking a big breath. “I know that his mum died and I can’t imagine how hard that was for him. And I know you and your heart and…I’m worried that you heard his mum died and then immediately ran back to him. Seeing you and him on the train today…”

Layla frowned as if she couldn’t think of the words.

“What?” Rose asked.

“It was as if it was summer again,” Layla said, with a concerned glance. “There was just this energy around you two and so many looks that made me think that maybe there was more to friendship between you guys again.”

Rose’s eyes widened. She had thought she was being careful.

“Do you think…do you think the others noticed?” Rose said quietly.

“I don’t think so,” Layla said. “Al might have but he was watching you two carefully when we came in; Inez though very observant and good at reading people didn’t seem to pick up on anything, since she would have asked you about it and Graham…well Graham doesn’t like to admit things that don’t fit his narrative.”

Rose frowned. “What?”

“Nothing,” Layla said, shrugging it off. “The point is, if something is happening between you two…please be careful. I’m not going to ask what is happening because you would have told me and maybe you are just friends but you fancy him, I don’t know. Just please be careful. And tell him what you want. If you are okay keeping whatever is going on between you two quiet, then keep it quiet. But if you want more than, tell him.”

Rose nodded.

“I don’t know if Scorpius Malfoy is the guy for you,” Layla said. “And I’m definitely cautious about him. But if he makes you happy, I support you. And you know you can always talk to me about it, even if I disagree.”

Rose smiled and reached out and hugged Layla.

“Thank you, Layla.”

* * *

Two days later, Scorpius walked into the Great Hall, ignoring all the glances in his direction as he walked to the Slytherin table. He sat down across from Declan.

“Morning,” Scorpius said, pouring himself some coffee.

“Morning Scorp,” Declan said. “Listen, I need to tell you—”

“Malfoy! You son of a bitch!” Jordan said, coming towards him and clapping him on the shoulder. “I can’t believe you managed to keep her a secret for so long!”

“What?” Scorpius asked, confused.

“Jordan, let the man breath,” Declan said.

“I’m just saying Malfoy, I’m surprised you kept her a secret for so long,” Jordan said, looking at the paper in his hands. “I mean this says that since August you two have been shagging. That’s quite the feat.”

“What are you talking about?” Scorpius said, reaching for the paper only for Jordan to pull it back from him.

Declan grabbed the paper out of Jordan’s hands with a glare, handing it to Scorpius.

Scorpius looked down at the headline and immediately clenched his fist.

**_Rose Weasley and Scorpius Malfoy: An Illicit Affair?_ **

Below the headlines were pictures of Rose and Scorpius at Platform 9 3/4, Rose’s hand on Scorpius’s arm and Scorpius beaming at her. Albus was completely cut out from the frame, despite the fact that he had been standing no more than two feet from Scorpius at the time.

“What the fuck?” Scorpius said. “What is this?”

“That my friend, is an expose of your relationship with Weasley,” Jordan said hitting the paper in his hands. “Surprised you kept it quiet this long.”

“Jordan, don’t be an arse,” Declan said. “This is Skeeter’s writing. You know you can’t take it seriously.”

“Read the article, there is some incriminating evidence in there,” Jordan said.

Scorpius looked down, looking to read the article.

_Rose Weasley, daughter of Ron and Hermione Weasley, and Scorpius Malfoy, son of Draco and Astoria Malfoy, are rumored to have been dating for months now in secret. This reporter herself can confirm that when they saw each other again at Platform 9 ¾ that the chemistry between them was magnetic before they ran onto the train, presumably to do some snogging._

_One cannot help but wonder how long this has been going on…The Young Malfoy was attached to Mila Torres until this past summer, when Scorpius started being photographed more with Albus Potter, Rose Weasley’s cousin. Perhaps Albus decided to make friends with his cousin’s new beau? The two were even spotted at Diagon Alley before the they started their seventh year, with whispers that they were snogging in the back of the bookstore, though many said they were just speaking after running into each other._

_There have also been whispers that Scorpius ended things with Miss Torres because of his relationship with Miss Weasley and that is why they have kept it quiet for so long, to cover the tracks from their affair. There is also the other possibility that both their parents opposed the relationship due to their own animosity, thus leading the two to hide their relationship._

_It was said by an anonymous source that Miss Weasley was at the Malfoy Manor multiple times during the winter holiday after Scorpius’s mother passed. The source said that the two spent the time locked in his room and while Draco Malfoy told the source Miss Weasley was a friend of Scorpius’s and there to comfort him, the sounds that were coming from the room when one walked by were allegedly anything but friendly. Do you know the last time you moaned a friend’s name in a platonic nature, as young Rose was said to do?_

_There were also reports of the two sneaking away from his mother’s funeral, assumingly to have another tryst. Of course, Miss Torres was there as well and seemed incredibly upset the whole funeral…is it the loss of an older female role model or the pain of a betrayal that caused this emotion?_

_Either way, Rose and Scorpius’s affair is one that for all reasons, their family histories included, to be star-crossed, forbidden, and illicit. But perhaps the fact that they shouldn’t be together is what made them more attracted to each other._

Scorpius finished the article and stared at it, trying to ensure that his face remained neutral.

Jordan was right. There was some incrementing evidence because some of the evidence pointed out were things that had happened. But some things were just wrong.

He couldn’t believe Skeeter was doing this again. He couldn’t believe that she brought Mila into it and her association with him forced her to be in the papers again. He couldn’t imagine how Rose, who seemed grateful this past summer that Skeeter never had anything to write about her, would react to being front page of the gossip section.

“You’re such a dog,” Jordan said with a smirk. “Playing Mila while with Weasley. Genius, Scorp, genius.”

“I didn’t,” Scorpius said.

“Jordan it’s the gossip section and Skeeter,” Declan said. “There’s probably no shed of truth in it.”

“So Weasley didn’t moan your name then Malfoy?” Jordan teased. Jordan started making moaning noises, saying Scorpius’s name.

Scorpius tensed up, curling his fists.

“Freeman,” Declan said glaring at Jordan. “Stop. You know that didn’t happen.”

“I think I need to hear it from the man himself,” Jordan said, turning his attention towards Scorpius. “You want to say anything about the validity of this article, Malfoy?”

Scorpius let out a breath. He knew there was only one option. He and Rose hadn’t really discussed what their relationship was at this point and he didn’t feel like it was fair to make that decision for them.

“If you believe Skeeter’s article then you should go back to first year, Freeman,” Scorpius said, using a spoon to pick at his oatmeal. “Weasley and I are barely friends, let alone what Skeeter’s implying.”

Declan gave Scorpius a look and Scorpius could tell that Declan didn’t believe him. Afterall, he was able to put together that Scorpius and Rose were more than friends after one interaction with them over the summer, he was the one who warned him about the potential of this happening if they ever became public.

“Okay, Malfoy, if you say so,” Jordan said, shrugging. “Merlin knows how much I’d love to have Weasley moaning my name.”

“Fuck off,” Declan said, with a disgusted look as Jordan smirked at them before walking away. “Merlin he’s disgusting.”

Scorpius sighed, looking down at the article again.

“You know this is going to be the talk of the day, right?” Declan asked him.

“I know,” Scorpius said. “I should probably warn or apologize to Mila, since I’m sure she’ll be dragged into this.”

“Should probably warn Weasley too,” Declan said. “Regardless of whether or not what Skeeter says is true, she should probably know what’s coming her way today. Mila is tough, she can take care of herself and I’m sure Erica will be there to protect her if needed.”

“Yeah your girlfriend is definitely good at protecting her,” Scorpius said. “As I know from the number of times she has called me an arse.”

“I mean, you kind of are,” Declan said with a smirk.

Scorpius glared at Declan before sipping his coffee.

“It’d be alright you know,” Declan said, looking at the article. “If this article had some truth to it. There could be worse matches.”

Scorpius looked up at Declan with his brows furrowed.

“I saw the way you guys looked at each other at Diagon Alley,” Declan said. “And trust me, you have never looked at anyone the way you’re looking at Weasley in this photo.”

“Al was also there,” Scorpius said. “They just cut him out.”

“Well then you have a lot of balls,” Declan said. “Or you fancy this girl enough that you couldn’t control looking at her like she’s your saving grace even though her cousin was a foot away.”

A moment of silence came over them as they looked at the photos with Picture Rose touching Scorpius’s arm over and over again.

“Maybe what you told Jordan is right and you are just friends,” Declan said shrugging. “But if it’s more, that’s okay. You deserve to be happy.”

* * *

Rose wasn’t able to get breakfast this morning, because Layla warned her what waited for her that day. So instead, she went to classes on an empty stomach, trying to ignore the stares and whispers from her classmates.

Fortunately, the article came out on a Thursday. On Thursdays, she had Charms, Potions and Herbology and fortunately Inez was in all of those classes with her, with Layla in Charms and Potions. Graham was only in Charms with her, though that day he sat away from them, choosing instead to sit with the Ravenclaw boys he lived with.

“Why isn’t Graham sitting with us?” Rose asked when they were asked to practice the practical on their own.

“I think it has something to do with a blonde who apparently you’ve been having an affair with,” Layla said, her eyes darting to where Scorpius sat next to Declan.

“Not sure why he believes it without asking you,” Inez said, waving her wand to practice the motion. “He should know that Skeeter comes up with all sorts of baseless lies.”

Layla gave Rose a look, knowing that what Skeeter said this time wasn’t a lie.

“She’s such a shitty person,” Inez said. “Spreading gossip like that.”

“You literally love gossip more than any human I know,” Layla said, chuckling at the irony of Inez’s statement.

“Not like her!” Inez defended. “Skeeter ruins people’s life with her gossip! The only people I tell my gossip to is you guys.” Inez sighed. “It was one of the few positive things Mila pulled away from her break up with Scorpius was that she wouldn’t have to deal with people thinking they know her business. Now everyone thinks she’s a jilted woman and that Scorpius and Rose are awful humans.”

Rose snuck a glance at Mila, where she sat behind Scorpius and Declan next to Erica. While she would normally be talking with her friends who sat around her, instead she kept her head down, reading the book and practicing the wand movements, Erica practicing with her.

“Skeeter is just the worst,” Layla said.

“I can’t believe you’ve had to deal with her and people like her your whole life Rose,” Inez said. “Imagine if you and Scorpius were actually dating. Stories like this would happen nonstop. They wrote so much about Scorpius and Mila’s relationship and she wasn’t even known like you. You both are so well known and from dominant families…papers would write about you all the time.”

“Yeah you could kiss your privacy goodbye,” Layla said with a pointed look at Rose.

Rose took a deep breath looking down at her book and practicing the motions.

“Should I talk to Graham?” Rose asked.

“He’ll get over it,” Layla said. “Just give him a few days for him to see the fall out of the article and then talk to him.”

Rose nodded, looking over at Graham and sighing. She didn’t know why he was doing this. While he would sometimes choose not to sit with them, she couldn’t help but feel as if this time it was for a reason.

Her eyes wandered over to Scorpius, who looked up from his book then and made eye contact with her. She couldn’t help but smile, trying not to be obvious as she looked at him. He smiled back at her before Declan elbowed him to ask him a question.

Rose returned to her book a sense of longing coming over her.

She knew that Inez was right, that if she and Scorpius were dating publicly that mornings like this where a story was out about them would happen nonstop.

And yet, she couldn’t quite shake the feeling that she didn’t care.

Soon, class was dismissed and she packed up, listening to Inez and Layla talk about whether or not the spell they learned would be on their N.E.W.T.S. Rose walked next to them listening to their conversation when she felt someone push into her.

“Sorry about that,” Scorpius said as he walked by her, brushing against her. His hand found hers for a second, and she felt a piece of paper there, causing her to closer her hand to hold it tight before Scorpius walked away.

Rose excused herself to the bathroom, going into the stall and reading the note that Scorpius wrote her.

_Meet me in Potions Room 4 at 8 pm -S_

_P.S. You look pretty when you focus on taking notes in class._

Rose couldn’t help but blush, carefully placing the note in her bag, making a mental reminder to put the note into her box of things from Scorpius that she still had hidden under her bed.

* * *

As eight o’clock started to loom closer, Scorpius made his way out of the Common Room, keeping his head down so that he didn’t draw attention to the fact that he was leaving.

It had been a long day of people whispering all around him. He and Rose shared two classes that day, Charms and Potions, with each of them keeping to themselves, since the class was watching them like hawks. Scorpius tried ignoring it, which he did relatively successfully but it was harder when Jordan would come and make crude comments about Rose. Al, who normally would spend time in the evening with him, had gone flying that night and Scorpius noticed that Al didn’t invite him as he had in the past.

Scorpius opened the door to Potions Room 4 and found Rose in the room already, reading a book from where she sat on a desk. She looked up and gave him a beaming smile as he closed the door behind him.

“Hi,” She said from her perch. She put a bookmark in the book and put it down before looking back up to him.

In the time that it took her to do that, Scorpius had already closed the space between them, pushing her legs apart so that he could stand between them. He gave her a quick kiss.

“Hi,” Scorpius said. He ran his hands down her arms until he found hers, interlocking them. “How was your day?”

“It was…a day,” Rose said, shrugging. “I couldn’t even study in the library by myself without people whispering about me.”

Scorpius nodded. “Yeah. Seems we have been very popular gossip today.”

“I’ll say,” Rose said, biting her lip. “Mum sent me a short letter saying that her and Dad are working with your dad to make sure that we get our privacy.”

“My dad sent me a letter saying the same thing,” Scorpius said.

“Mum also asked if the article was true,” Rose said, her eyes moving down to stare at his chest. “She said that Dad and her wanted me to be happy but that if there is truth to the article it could change the statement they put out.”

Scorpius gulped. “What did you say?”

“I haven’t responded,” Rose said quietly. “I thought we should probably talk about it.”

A moment of silence fell over them and Scorpius couldn’t help but think back to the first time that they had this conversation about what was going on between them.

“I want,” Rose said nervously. She looked up at him and Scorpius could tell that she was trying to be brave. “I want to keep seeing you.”

Scorpius couldn’t help but smile at her.

“I want to keep seeing you to,” Scorpius said, causing Rose to brighten. “But—”

A flash of hurt passed through Rose and she began to deflate.

“Oh Merlin have I just made an idiot out of myself,” Rose muttered quietly.

“No, you didn’t,” Scorpius said quickly. “I want to keep seeing you but I don’t know if I want it to be public. I don’t know if I would want other people to know.”

“Oh,” Rose said with a frown. “Why? Are you…embarrassed by me?”

“No, not at all,” Scorpius said. “If anything, you should be embarrassed by me. I mean, you’re the golden child of two thirds of the Golden Trio. I’m known for being a former Death Eater’s son and having a dramatic first relationship.”

“Okay…” Rose said. “I still don’t know why you don’t want to tell people.”

Scorpius sighed. “Rose, I’ve been in the papers for years for my relationship drama with Mila. Since she and I stopped dating, I basically got to disappear for a while. And then my mum died and apparently that’s something that reporters feel the need to report on and now with this…we haven’t done anything to confirm our relationship and the whole castle is talking about us. Our parents are working on privacy measures for us. I don’t really want to have more attention drawn to me right now considering for the past two days everyone has been whispering about how my mum died.”

Rose nodded. “You don’t know that it would be that bad for us though.”

“Weasley, Rita Skeeter wrote about you moaning my name while we shagged,” Scorpius said, causing Rose’s face to become red. “And she created a whole narrative where I cheated on Mila with you. She did all this after seeing us interact one time. I…I don’t want to know what she could do with more information.”

“Yeah, I doubt either of our parents were thrilled with that detail,” Rose said quietly. “So, what exactly do you want? You want to keep seeing me but in secret? We don’t tell anyone at all, not even our parents, and just avoid each other?”

“We don’t have to avoid each other; we are friends,” Scorpius said. “But the relationship part…I want to protect that and keep it private. I just want to figure out what this is between us before we face the storm that would come from being public.”

Rose bit her lip and Scorpius could tell she was unsure. He couldn’t help but think about how they switched roles; during the summer she was the one who wanted to keep things private between them and not tell anyone and he was upset by that. At the time, he was ready to tell the world she was his girlfriend. Now he was the hesitant one about dealing with everyone and she didn’t seem sure.

“Rosie…if you don’t want to be private, that’s okay,” Scorpius said quietly. “But I can’t be public right now. I really don’t want to have every step of my grieving process documented as well as every moment of our relationship. I understand if this is a deal breaker though.”

Rose sat there quietly; her brows furrowed as she thought. She looked down at their hands for a few moments before taking a breath.

“Okay,” she said, her voice low. “We don’t have to tell anyone.”

“Are you sure?” Scorpius asked. “You’re okay with meeting like this, in secret, and not doing anything beyond platonic things when other people are around?”

Rose nodded. “It will be just like this summer again.”

She gave him a smile and Scorpius couldn’t help but think he saw a hint of sadness in it.

“I’ll tell my mum we’re just friends,” Rose said. She unhooked her hands from his and brought them to his neck, pulling him into a hug.

“Thank you,” Scorpius said into her hair as he held her waist. “I can’t even express how much it means to me.”

Rose pulled away, looking up at him with a loving look. “I don’t want to lose you. If we have to stay quiet for a while then we will.”

Scorpius’s heart swelled and he leaned down and kissed her hard, trying to put his all of his gratitude, care, and growing feelings for her into it. She kissed him back, pressing herself against him and wrapping her legs around his waist to pull him closer, to let him know that she wanted _more_.

After doing on a desk what Rose thought she would never _ever_ do on a school desk, yet feeling incredibly high afterwards, Rose and Scorpius said good night. Scorpius had kept kissing Rose, and Rose had to all but force herself out of his arms in order to make it back to the Ravenclaw Tower before curfew.

Rose answered the riddle and walked into the tower, giving a wave to where Graham and Inez sat studying in the corner of the Common Room before heading up to her bed. She put her bookbag on the side of her bed before lying down on her bed even though she hadn’t changed.

Rose couldn’t help but feel a gnawing feeling whenever she thought about what she agreed to with Scorpius. He had wanted to keep them quiet for now and while she understood his reasonings she couldn’t help but feel…like it wasn’t quite what she wanted.

She shook her head, pushing that thought out. She knew she wanted to be with Scorpius. And if being secret for a little bit was what it took to be with him then she would do it. They wouldn’t stay a secret forever.

But she couldn’t stop the lingering hope that Scorpius would decide to not keep their relationship private sooner rather than later.


	2. but it dies a million little times

For the next week, Rose and Scorpius had met in secret three times, often with Scorpius accompanying her on her Head Girl rounds through the castle. For the most part, their interactions had been limited when other people were around.

At least, they were until Scorpius dropped his bag on the table where Rose was studying in the Library and sat down next to her.

“What are you doing?” Rose asked, confused.

“I thought we could study together,” Scorpius said. “You’re working on the Potions essay, right?”

“Yeah but…” Rose said, looking around. “People can see us.”

“I know,” Scorpius said. “Is that a problem?”

“I thought you wanted to keep things private between us?” Rose said. Despite herself, she hoped that he would say that he had completely abandoned that idea.

“I do,” Scorpius said. “That doesn’t mean that we can’t be friends in public though. No one has to know what we do when you’re supposed to be doing your duty as Head Girl.”

Rose couldn’t help the blush that came over herself, looking down at her paper.

“Please Weasley?” Scorpius asked in a low whisper leaning closer to her. His hand came to rest on her knee under the table. “It’s just…hard being away from you right now.”

While what he said was sweet, Rose recognized the tone below it. She could tell the pain underneath it. She knew that him wanting to be with her at that moment had little to do with his affection for her and more to do with his grief.

And even when she looked up at Scorpius, she could see the pain in his eyes and knew that his mind was a much bigger mess than he wanted anyone to know.

“Of course,” Rose said. She reached her hand down and placed it on his. “Is there anything I can do?”

Scorpius turned his hand over and interlocked their fingers. “Just letting me be near you helps.”

Someone dropped a book, causing Scorpius and Rose to jump apart. Scorpius looked around, seeing if someone would come around the corner, but no one did.

Rose studied him for a second. It was impossible for her not to notice how haggard he looked. Scorpius was always put together and yet since his mother died, he hadn’t done his hair and his robes didn’t’ have the same impeccable neatness they used to.

“Are you sure there isn’t anything more I can do?” Rose asked.

Scorpius gave her a smile, though it didn’t quite meet his eyes.

“You do more than enough,” Scorpius said in a loving tone. “I just want to study with you. It would almost be like when we would just read together over the summer.”

“Okay,” Rose said, nodding and giving him a small smile. She turned back to her paper. “I should warn you that my goal is to finish this paper today.”

“Well I should warn you that my goal is to not kiss you and distract myself,” Scorpius said. “So I guess we have a lot of work to do.”

“I guess so,” Rose said with a grin.

Scorpius gave her one last smirk before getting his parchment out and planning his paper.

They both worked hard on their papers, Rose finishing and Scorpius needing to do revisions, their feet pressed together, under the table and out of sight, the whole time.

* * *

Scorpius poured himself coffee, rubbing his eyes in exhaustion. While he had been out with Rose the night before, accompanying her on her rounds and also pulling her into broom cupboards to snog, he had been having trouble sleeping in the few weeks being back at Hogwarts. Rose had asked him a lot about it, asking if they should stop seeing each other late at night or if something else was going on.

He knew that she understood it had something to do with his mum, but he didn’t have the heart to tell her the whole truth of it.

He had been having insomnia since his mother died, unable to think of anything but his mum and the final days of her life. She had been so sick and so unlike herself; his mum was the normally the light in every room, pulling his father out of shell, and to see her unable to even laugh had been jarring. He just couldn’t stop picturing her sitting in the bed, looking frail with a winter hat on to keep her bald head warm, barely able to smile.

“You okay Scorp?” Al said from across table, snapping Scorpius out of his trance.

“Yeah,” Scorpius said. “Just didn’t sleep well.”

“Well, considering you snuck in past curfew last night, makes sense,” Declan said from his spot next to Al. Next to him, Erica spoke to Mila. “Where were you anyway?”

“The library,” Scorpius said. “Working on my potions essay.”

“I thought you and Rose finished that last week?” Albus asked with suspicious eyes.

Although Albus had yet to say anything to Scorpius about what Rita Skeeter wrote about him and Rose a few weeks ago, Scorpius wasn’t convinced that it was because Albus thought there was no truth to the story. If anything, Al’s avoidance of Scorpius as well as him watching Scorpius and Rose interact like a hawk told Scorpius the opposite.

Albus was incredibly suspicious about what was going on between them.

“I’m sure he and your fiery cousin finished something last week, but I doubt it was the essays,” Jordan said with a smirk, causing Al to grimace. “Most likely they finished each other.”

“Gross,” Mila said from next to Scorpius. She pulled her attention away from Erica and her conversation to give a disgusted look at Jordan. “Can you ever not be a disgusting human?”

“Can you ever hide your thirst for Scorpius?” Jordan asked, causing Mila to glare.

“Dude, shut up,” Albus said. “You don’t have to be such a dick all the time.”

“I’m sorry Al, but I only say things that are true,” Jordan said with a shrug. “Mila is too busy thirsting for Scorpius that she doesn’t even realize that he is shagging your cousin, who honestly I don’t think knew blokes existed outside of books until recently. If anything, you should be thanking Scorpius for lowering his standards enough for your little nerd Rose.”

Albus was about to respond, but Scorpius beat him to it.

“Don’t be an arse about Rose,” Scorpius said. He clenched his fist under the table, feeling incredibly angry about Jordan’s words. Jordan looked at Scorpius and almost appeared to be hiding a triumphant grin, as if he specifically chose words that he knew would set Scorpius off. “You can call me names and be an arse to me, but you don’t get to call her names or tease her for reading.”

Jordan shrugged, that flash of triumph and joy still in his eyes. “Why Scorpius, those never bothered you before. Was there some truth to Skeeter’s article?”

“I told you there wasn’t, but that doesn’t mean you have an excuse to be a garbage human being towards her,” Scorpius said. “You can pick on me all you want, but don’t act like Rose is somehow less than anyone here.”

Jordan smirked and then looked over at Mila. “Your seduction tactics clearly aren’t working. Perhaps you should try a red wig next time.”

Mila glared at Jordan before getting up from the table and walking away.

“Fuck you, Freeman,” Erica said, before following after her friend, wrapping her arm around Mila as they walked out of the Great Hall.

“Well, I think I’ve done enough around here,” Jordan said, getting up. “Scorpius, I look forward to seeing you around later. Good to know that Al’s cousin is a trigger point for you. Thought you’d be more subtle while Mila was around.”

Scorpius shook his head in disgust.

Jordan put a hand on Al’s shoulder. “Honestly, I’m surprised you think that Malfoy here is actually good enough for your cousin. Trust me, with her face and body and minor adjustments to her personality, she could fuck any bloke she wanted, like that sister of yours.”

“Alright, you can go now,” Declan said, standing up and pushing Jordan away from Al. “You’ve been enough of a git for now.”

Jordan saluted, that smug grin on his face knowing that he got under both Al and Scorpius’s skin.

Declan sat back down. “How he manages to go without getting punched in the face every day is shocking to me.”

“Well, you always get him out of situations before the person has a chance,” Scorpius said, shaking his head. “What a fucking bastard.”

Scorpius looked over at Al, who was looking at his breakfast with a fuming look.

“What he said about Lily wasn’t true you know that right?” Scorpius asked Al.

“Yeah, trust me, I know,” Albus said. “I’m aware that she does date a lot of guys but I know that she’s not sleeping around at 15.”

“Then why are you trying to melt your bowl with your stare?” Scorpius said.

“Scorp, I would leave him be,” Declan said quietly, causing Scorpius to send him a confused look.

Al however looked up and sent a look at Scorpius.

“I’m just wondering what the fuck is going on with you and my cousin, Scorpius,” Albus said. “Because I keep trying to trust your word, but you’ve never cared about what Jordan or anyone else says about my family, but suddenly, Rose is a trigger for you. Just wondering if maybe there is some truth and you two aren’t telling me something.” He stood up. “I’m going to fly, I’ll see you guys later.”

He walked out of the Great Hall not looking back.

“I think that is the most angry I’ve ever seen Al,” Declan said, seeming pretty impressed. “Even when he’s angry he’s still pretty calm. Impressive.”

Declan looked back at Scorpius, who was still looking after Al.

“Don’t know why he doesn’t believe me,” Scorpius said, although he felt his stomach tighten at the lie.

“Mate, you need to realize how it is from his point of view,” Declan said. “Jordan has been saying shit about you and Weasley since the article came out, saying that’s where you are when you come back after curfew. Potter’s been forced to listen to it for weeks now; even if he believes you, what Jordan is saying could be getting to his head.”

Scorpius nodded before looking across the Great Hall. He saw Rose getting up from the Ravenclaw table, laughing at something Graham Taylor had said. He felt himself frown as he watched Rose place a hand on Taylor’s shoulder, laughing at his joke, not liking how Taylor looked at her.

“Thanks mate,” Scorpius said, standing up as he watched Rose walk away from her friends. “I have to go.”

Declan followed Scorpius with his eyes, noticing that Scorpius followed Rose out of the Great Hall.

“Idiot,” Declan said to himself, shaking his head at his best friend’s lack of subtlety.

* * *

“Hey,” Rose said, closing the door behind him after he had followed her into an empty Charms classroom.

Despite the fact that Scorpius was still feeling tense from the conversation with Jordan and Al a few moments earlier (and his lack of sleep), he felt himself start to relax as he reached for Rose, engulfing her in a hug.

“I missed you,” Scorpius said, taking in her scent.

Rose placed a kiss on his chest. “I missed you too.”

She went to pull away, but Scorpius held her closer, not ready to let her go.

With her around everything was okay. He wasn’t haunted by the images of his mother in her last few days, Jordan wasn’t around trying to stir the pot, he didn’t have to ignore Mila’s flirtations, and Al wasn’t watching them like a hawk. Something about Rose just calmed everything inside him.

It was why the only good sleep he had gotten in the month since his mother had passed was when Rose came to his house.

Rose ran a hand through his hair. “Are you okay?”

“Just let me hold you for a while,” Scorpius said, holding her close and wishing that they never had to leave that room.

* * *

Rose and Scorpius ended up spending many hours in that Charms classroom, holding each other. Rose, who had been on her way to spend that Saturday in the library, had ended up reading her favorite parts of _Hogwarts, A History_ to Scorpius while he rested his head on her lap, dozing in and out of sleep.

Although Scorpius didn’t tell Rose what was going on, Rose knew that at least a small part was his mum. Today though, Rose couldn’t help but feel as though there was another reason as to why he was so tense when he entered the room. Rose had seen Mila walk out of the Great Hall, appearing upset, and wondered if Scorpius had something to do with it.

Mila had, in the past weeks since they had been back at Hogwarts, been not so covert with her flirtations to Scorpius. While Scorpius seemed not to notice, treating her the same as always, it was very clear to anyone watching that Mila was interested in Scorpius again. While Inez hadn’t confirmed anything, because according to her Mila hadn’t actually told her that she wanted Scorpius back, Inez did share that she wouldn’t be surprised if Mila wanted to get back together with Scorpius.

So, seeing her walk out, upset, Rose couldn’t help but wonder if maybe Scorpius finally had enough and told her that it wasn’t going to happen between them.

Scorpius turned in her lap, nuzzling his nose against her belly and wrapping his arms around her.

“I love listening to you read,” Scorpius whispered. He kissed her stomach softly.

Rose’s stomach fluttered as he kept laying little kisses across her midsection.

“Thank you,” he said quietly, looking up at her with soft eyes.

“For what?” she asked.

“Being you,” Scorpius said. He sat up, before leaning in and resting his forehead against hers. “I think I’m in love with you.”

Rose’s eyes widened and she looked at him, but found Scorpius’s eyes closed. She understood then, that he wasn’t saying that for any reason other than just to tell her.

She leaned forward, kissing him and wrapping herself around him, hoping to put all the words that she already felt but wasn’t ready to say into it.

An hour later they both lay on the ground, satisfied and half clothed, Rose gave small kisses to Scorpius’s bare chest.

“I probably should go to the library,” Rose whispered softly. “I don’t want to fall behind on my N.E.W.T.S studying schedule.”

Scorpius looked down at her and Rose could tell that he didn’t want her to go from his face. He held her closer, pressing a kiss to her head.

“What are you supposed to work on today?”

“Charms,” Rose said, writing her name on his chest with her finger.

“You didn’t have to spend the day with me if you needed to study,” Scorpius said. “I know you want to stay on your schedule.”

Rose smiled, feel grateful that he, unlike her family and friends who teased her for her intense study schedule, respected her schedule. Just that morning, when she had gotten up from the Ravenclaw table, Graham had teased her about her study habits, asking her to ditch studying and play board games with him and Inez.

“I wanted to spend the day with you,” Rose said, finding that she meant it. “Besides, it was a lighter day today, so I’ll be able to finish all I wanted to do tonight.”

“Good,” Scorpius said, he kissed her on the forehead. “I don’t want to be a distraction.”

Rose looked up at him before giving him a kiss. “You never could be. My concentration is very good.”

Scorpius smiled at her, before handing her shirt, which had been by his head.

Rose and Scorpius got dressed and Scorpius collected Rose’s books and put them in her book bag for her, handing it back to her when it was full.

Rose grabbed the book bag, placing it on her shoulder before wrapping her arms around his waist. He cupped her face, kissing her softly.

“Scorpius,” Rose whispered.

“Yeah?” Scorpius said between kisses.

“What you said earlier about how you feel,” Rose said, pulling away slightly and looking at the ground. “It’s true for me too.”

Scorpius smiled at her, the first real smile she had seen from him in a long time. He pulled her closer, his hands warm on her cheeks, kissing her passionately before resting his forehead against hers.

“I don’t know how I got so lucky,” Scorpius said. He kissed her on the forehead. “You better go study, so you don’t fall behind.”

With one last kiss, which they both had to force themselves away from, they exited the charms classroom, Rose heading in the direction of the library while Scorpius headed towards the dungeons.

Rose was so lost in the high of Scorpius, replaying their day together as well as the sound of him saying that he was in love with her, that she didn’t notice another person walking down the hall until they ran into each other, causing the other person’s parchment to go everywhere.

“Oh Merlin, I am so sorry,” Rose said, crouching down to pick up the parchment.

“Well Weasley, I thought your eyesight was fine but clearly having your nose two inches from books have finally caused you to go blind,” Mila said with a glare in Rose’s direction.

Rose handed the parchment to Mila, who grabbed it out of Rose’s hand. Rose gulped, feeling nervous.

“Thank you for completely causing my notes to get unorganized. This is exactly how I wanted to spend my Saturday night, organizing these,” Mila said, stuffing the notes in her bag.

“I’m sorry,” Rose said quietly.

“What are you even doing here?” Mila said. “I thought you were holed up in the library every waking hour of the day.”

Rose let out a breath. She was never exactly sure what she had done to earn Mila’s tone, but it was one of the few things that had been consistent over her seven years at Hogwarts. Despite Rose’s friendship with Inez, Mila had never liked Rose. While Mila didn’t go out of her way to bully Rose, any interaction they had together was never positive, mostly because of Mila’s complete disdain for Rose.

“I was just doing…stuff,” Rose said. “I haven’t been to the library.”

“So you’re just hanging out in the Charms Corridor?” Mila asked, with a raised eyebrow. “What was the library becoming too loud? Those first years interrupting your study plan for your N.E.W.T.S?”

Rose took a deep breath and looked down, hating herself for feeling embarrassed at Mila’s words. She had just gone from feeling so happy about Scorpius and how he treated her love of studying and now felt like she was slapped in the face with reality.

“You know, it’s actually nuts to me that people out there believe Skeeter’s story about you and Scorpius,” Mila said. “I mean anyone that even barely knows you two knows how ridiculous it is.”

“Why is it ridiculous?” Rose asked before she could stop herself.

Mila scoffed. “Scorpius is popular and well liked and you are the Weasley people forget about because she has no interesting traits about her besides her obsessive study habits. Why on earth would Scorpius ever be interested in someone like you?”

Rose took a deep breath, a part of her wanting to let Mila know that Scorpius _was_ interested and had spent the whole day with her, part of that time spent meticulously making her moan until she came, telling her that he was in love with her, and how amazing she was, but knew that wouldn’t help.

Because even if Scorpius did all that in private, he didn’t want anyone else to know about them. Maybe because he also thought that the idea of them was ridiculous.

“Hey Rose!”

Mila and Rose both looked behind Mila, where Graham was coming towards them with a concerned look on his face. He walked past Mila, barely registering her before standing next to Rose, closer than he normally did.

“Sorry I’m late, I got caught up playing Wizard Chess with Inez.”

Rose frowned at him, confused as to what he was apologizing being late for. She hadn’t planned on seeing Graham that day, especially in the middle of the Charms corridor. Graham just gave her a smile, throwing an arm around her as he looked back at Mila, something that made Rose even more confused.

“Mila, how are you doing today?” he asked, his hand rubbing Rose’s shoulder.

Mila looked at Graham’s hand on Rose’s shoulder before looking back at him with a smirk.

“Clearly not as well as yours is about to be,” she said. “If Weasley is as meticulous in the rest of her life as she in studying, I imagine you’ll be a happy guy.”

Rose frowned, confused by what she meant, while Graham gave her a grimace.

“Well, I’ll leave you to be. Remember, no glove no love,” Mila said, with a wave before walking off with one last demeaning look at Rose.

Once Mila was out of sight Rose moved away from Graham, wanting distance between them before looking up at Graham.

“What was that?” Rose asked confused.

Graham shrugged. “She was just insinuating something was happening between us.”

“Oh,” Rose said. “Well that’s weird.”

Rose saw something pass through Graham’s face before he looked away from her. Rose had a nagging feeling about what that look could be and why it came up so often, but, wanting to regain the high that Scorpius had given her, chose not to ask about it.

* * *

“How is it possible that we’re both so bad at this game?” Declan asked as he stared at the Wizard’s chess board he and Scorpius were playing.

“Because you both don’t have any level of concentration,” Erica said, looking up from her copy of _Witch Weekly_. “You get too distracted.”

“We do not,” Scorpius said, looking up at her. “We are very focused.”

“Whose turn is it?” Erica asked with a knowing look.

Declan widened his eyes. “I thought it was Scorp’s turn.”

“I was waiting for you to go!” Scorpius said, giving a confused look to Declan. “Are you telling me we both have been waiting for five minutes for the other person to go?”

“Well, thank you for proving my point,” Erica said. “I see you learned nothing about Wizard’s Chess even though you spent nearly three years with Mila.”

“Hey, she’s coached by Inez so that’s not fair,” Scorpius said. “I never had a chance to learn.”

“Or you didn’t try,” Declan said with a knowing glance.

Scorpius shrugged, knowing that his friend was right, before asking Declan about Quidditch, Erica rolling her eyes and going back to reading her magazine. The chess game sat between them, completely forgotten about.

The three of them looked at the entrance of the Common Room when the door slammed, a very serious Mila entering through it and coming towards them.

“Scorpius,” Mila said, her tone flat. “We need to talk.”

“Why?” Scorpius asked, causing Mila to frown.

He hadn’t seen Mila this way in a while; since they had broken up she had been fairly calm and kind. But seeing her, so serious and clearly, fuming underneath that calm layer she was trying to portray, he couldn’t help but remember why they were so awful as a couple. She was a very intense person, always wanting things to go a particular way, and Scorpius often didn’t align or would purposefully not go her way.

“Because I said we do,” Mila said, through her teeth.

Scorpius could tell that she was getting frustrated with him and he couldn’t help but get frustrated himself. He felt that they had a decent friendship since they broke up; while she had been flirting with him more since break, Scorpius had ignored it, because of his relationship with Rose and because he wasn’t interested. And now, he felt as if they were dating again and he suddenly did something wrong that Mila was upset about.

“Fine,” Scorpius said. He stood up. “We can talk in my room.”

“Perfect,” Mila said, shooting him a bitter smile.

Scorpius led the way to his room, not missing the concerned look that passed between Erica and Declan as they walked away. Scorpius held the door open for Mila and she walked in, throwing her bag on his bed before looking at Al, who was laying on his bed, with a glare.

“Get out, Potter,” Mila said.

“What?” Al asked, shooting a confused look at Scorpius.

“Get out,” Mila said icily. “We need to talk in private and I need you to get the fuck out.”

Albus sent a questioning look at Scorpius, almost as if asking what was happening and all Scorpius could do is shrug. Albus then got up, grabbing his coat and his book.

“Well, it’s been wonderful seeing you Mila,” Albus said sarcastically as he passed. “We must do it again.”

Mila glared after him, turning that glare to Scorpius when the door shut.

“So what’s up?” Scorpius said, trying to hide his frustration at her demanding to speak to him in private.

This situation was not new to them. When they were dating, there were many times that Scorpius would do something to piss Mila off, she would drag him into his room to yell at him and typically they would have it out, screaming at each other, only to end up in his bed after. The problem wouldn’t exactly be solved, sometimes they would start fighting again as they got dressed, but they would forget about it long enough to each have an orgasm.

“What the fuck is going on with you and Rose Weasley?” Mila asked her tone harsh.

Scorpius frowned at her. “What?”

“What is going on with you and Rose Weasley?” Mila said. “Don’t play dumb; you haven’t given a shit about when Jordan makes gross comments about her before, but this morning you did—”

“So because I don’t like Jordan being an arse about her, that means that something is happening between us?” Scorpius asked.

“Well considering the fact that we dated for three fucking years and I had to beg you to defend me when Jordan made disgusting comments about me, yeah I do think something is happening,” Mila said. Scorpius grimaced upon realizing she was right. “Combined with Skeeters article, which we both know always have a slight bit of truth to them and the fact that suddenly you two are talking a decent amount and studying together in the library, yeah my guess is you’re either shagging her or you’re trying to.”

Scorpius shook his head, trying to think of a cover. “You know Skeeter’s articles are never based in truth—”

“Well she always got it right that you were a complete jackass when she wrote about our relationship,” Mila said. “So clearly she knows what she’s talking about.”

“Yeah, I was obviously always the problem in our relationship,” Scorpius said, hostilely. “The fact that you overreact to anything that happens that isn’t what you decided is okay has absolutely nothing to do with it.”

Mila glared at him. “Well if you weren’t such an idiot who did stupid things then I wouldn’t have had to get so angry at you.”

“So, what exactly are you furious at me for now?” Scorpius said. “Having a gossip article written about me? Defending a girl who has spoken to Jordan a handful of times against him? What?”

“I’m not furious!” Mila yelled. “I just want to know what is going on. I feel like I have that right.”

“Why the fuck would you have the right to know anything about my personal life?” Scorpius asked. “We aren’t together anymore. You don’t have that right.”

A hurt look passed through Mila’s face and Scorpius could tell he hit a nerve. When they were dating, getting that hurt look was always a moment of victory for Scorpius, because it meant that he wasn’t losing the argument, but that he had a chance at winning. Because their arguments when they were dating were always about winning.

Now though, it made me feel guilty, because he no longer cared about winning arguments with her.

“I think I deserve to know if you’re shagging someone new,” Mila said, her voice quiet but firm. “Especially when the person that you’ve chosen appears to be Rose fucking Weasley.”

Something clicked for Scorpius then. Although he had never understood it, Mila had always held a grudge against Rose, for reasons that no one really understood. While some people held grudges against the Weasley-Potter family because they had blood purist beliefs, that was never why Mila disliked them. Mila herself was a half-blood, her family on the same side as Rose’s parents during the war. But from the moment that Mila arrived at Hogwarts, she had a distain for the Weasley-Potter kids, with a specific dislike towards Rose. Nothing caused it to change, not Inez’s close friendship with Rose, not the fact that Rose had clearly done nothing to Mila, not even time changed it. But Mila held onto her mysterious grudge, treating Rose poorly whenever they interacted.

“Are you upset that I’m potentially moving on or the fact that it is with Rose?” Scorpius asked. Mila frowned at Scorpius’s use of Rose’s first name.

“Since when are you on a first name basis with her?” Mila asked.

“Why does it matter?” Scorpius responded. “I’m not here to get involved in your petty grudge against her—”

“Scorpius, I’m trying to protect you!” Mila yelled. “I don’t want you to get hurt—”

“And Rose Weasley is going to hurt me?” Scorpius said. “Nothing is even happening between us—”

“Oh bull fucking shit,” Mila said, cutting him off. “I know you Scorpius, I know you better than anyone. I know that something is happening with you and her. You either are shagging her or trying to or you have genuine feelings for her. So, can you just tell me?”

“Mila, even if something was going on, I wouldn’t have to tell you,” Scorpius said. “We aren’t together and I don’t owe you that. I don’t know anything about your personal life! And I don’t want to.”

Mila took in a breath, biting her lip before speaking.

“That is because you never loved me as much as I love you,” Mila said, her voice shakey. She took a deep breath, and Scorpius could tell she was pushing the emotion away, as she always did in arguments. Her face returned to the cold, impassive face Scorpius was used to when they fought.

“Scorpius, even though we broke up, I love you still,” Mila said. Scorpius winced, her confession confirming what he already knew and had been trying to avoid. “And I don’t want you to get hurt. And where Weasley is concerned, you will get hurt.”

Scorpius shrugged, unsure of what to say. A moment of silence passed between them, Mila looking at Scorpius intensely while Scorpius looked over her head at the Arrows poster above Declan’s bed, watching the players fly in and out of the frame.

“You know Weasley is fucking Taylor right?”

Scorpius’s eyes snapped down to Mila then and he felt the jealousy start to kick in.

Mila smirked at him, as if he had just proved her point with his reaction.

“She met him in the Charms Corridor today,” Mila said, her voice laced with malice. “He came over and put her arm around her and was clearly acting as anything but a friend.”

“Okay,” Scorpius said, trying to keep his voice even. “Why would I care?”

Scorpius had recognized his mistake though. By having a reaction to what she said about Rose and Graham, Mila had taken the lead in their argument, something that still obviously meant something to her.

“Well, the object of your affection is clearly shagging Graham Taylor,” Mila said, taking a step closer. Scorpius tried to keep his reaction neutral, but knew he was failing. “And if you really don’t care about Weasley, then kiss me. Shag me, even. Prove to me that you don’t care about Weasley. Or shag me to get back at Weasley for whatever is going on with her and Taylor.”

Mila took another step closer to him, running her hand along his arm.

Scorpius looked at her, as if asking if she was serious when he knew she was. It was classic Mila, classic, cunning Mila, to put him in a situation where he would have to prove that what she was saying wasn’t true. When they were dating, it was that if he wasn’t putting his friends first then he’d spend a certain number of hours with her. If he cared about what other’s thought about her and her relationship then he’d defend her against Jordan. If he wasn’t going to break up with her then he would be more attentive.

The worst part, was that while it wasn’t fair of Mila to give him those ultimatums, he couldn’t say that they weren’t unjustified. She was always right with them and she was right once again in regards to Rose.

Only this time, he wasn’t going to just do what she wanted to avoid an argument.

Scorpius stepped away from her. Mila nodded, as if understanding before he even said anything.

“You should go,” Scorpius said.

Mila grabbed her bag from his bed and walked towards the door.

“I really hope you treat her better than you treated me,” Mila said, giving him one last glance before walking out.

* * *

Word about Scorpius and Mila’s fight spread like wildfire throughout the castle. By Monday, Rose wasn’t exactly sure what to bleive about what happened between he two.

Albus had found Rose in the library on Saturday night, telling her that Mila and Scorpius had kicked him out. Rose had tried to keep her expression neutral, focusing intensely on the book in front of her, and while Albus didn’t push her, she knew that he could tell that she wasn’t happy about the fact that Scorpius was alone with Mila in his bedroom.

On Sunday, Rose heard that Mila and Scorpius fought because Scorpius was moving on, that they fought and then hooked up, and that they fought because Mila was moving on. Inez, normally Rose’s go to gossip queen, had no information, saying that Mila had been in her bedroom all weekend since, and that she didn’t know what happened.

Either way, when Monday morning came, Rose was feeling sick about the whole thing. While she trusted Scorpius, she couldn’t help but have her stomach twist at the thought of him and Mila alone together. It didn’t help that many people thought they were getting back together now, or that they had hooked up at some point and that was what caused the fight.

Rose wanted to scream when she heard people talking about it, saying that Scorpius was with _her,_ not Mila. That he was in love with her and they had been together for over a month now and Mila wasn’t even in Scorpius’s mind like that anymore.

But she couldn’t. Even though she knew her relationship with Scorpius, she also couldn’t help but wonder if she was just a side story in the great Mila and Scorpius romance. If maybe that was why Scorpius didn’t want to be public with her, because he was just buying time until he was ready to be with Mila again.

Rose felt nervous for her classes with Scorpius. She had avoided him on Sunday, studying in the Common Room with Graham, Inez and Layla and eating at odd times when she knew he wouldn’t be in the Great Hall. But there was no avoiding him today.

Rose reached and opened her cabinet to put her face wash away and saw the perfume that Graham got her sitting there. She grabbed it and sprayed it, figuring that she could probably use the nice smell since she wouldn’t have been able to shower until that night, before walking out into the bedroom where Layla was still getting dressed.

“Did Inez head down already?” Rose asked as she walked to her bed, putting the books she would need for the day in her bag.

“Yeah, you know how she is,” Layla said. “Always likes to be the first one in class. I think she wanted to check on Mila too.”

Rose paused for a moment at the mention of Mila’s name before resuming her task without saying anything.

Layla gave Rose a once over before putting her earrings on.

“Are you okay with everything?” Layla asked.

“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” Rose asked, keeping her expression neutral.

“You know why,” Layla said softly. “You’re…you’re okay with whatever arrangement you and Scorpius have going right?”

Rose closed her bag, biting her lip at Layla’s words. This was the first time Layla ever explicitly asked her about Scorpius and the fact that she knew something was happening with them. Normally she always tried to walk around it, seeing if Rose would say anything or speak in hypotheticals.

Overall, Rose was okay with the arrangement that she had Scorpius had. She loved being with him and quickly fell back in love with him. She loved all the quiet moments that they had together with no one around. Her Head Girl patrols were always better with him.

But the fact that she had to keep it a secret had been waning on her since it started. She couldn’t help but stare in envy at couples who held hands in the halls and who got to go to Hogsmeade together. She realized how badly she wanted that, wanted to be with Scorpius like that.

But he hadn’t seemed to have wanted to budge on keeping them a secret.

“Of course, I am,” Rose said quietly. “I could always stop if I wasn’t okay with it.”

There was a moment of silence, and Rose knew Layla was wondering if what Rose said was true. Rose found herself wondering the same thing.

Layla nodded in understanding, before changing the topic. Rose sent her a grateful look and they started down to the Great Hall.

Before they got there thought, Scorpius was walking towards them and his eyes landed on Rose before they quickly slid over to Layla. Rose could see that he was thinking of some way to pull her aside without raising suspicion, but Layla just put her hand on Rose’s shoulder.

“I’ll see you in class, Rose,” Layla said, continuing down the stairs. “Bye Malfoy.”

Scorpius frowned after her in confusion before turning and grabbing Rose’s hand, pulling her into a broom cupboard nearby.

“Did you tell her?” Scorpius asked once he had shut the door.

Rose frowned at him. “No. She’s always been suspicious, even last summer but I never confirmed anything.”

“Okay,” Scorpius said, nodding. “Good. Wouldn’t want anyone to know.”

Rose felt her heart sink as he said that.

Rose watched Scorpius, noticing that he seemed more distracted than usual.

“Are you okay?” she asked him.

“Yeah,” Scorpius said. “Just…Mila and I got into it this weekend.”

“I heard,” Rose said, nodding as the knot in her stomach tightened. “What about?”

Scorpius let out a small laugh. “Believe it or not, you.”

“Why?”

“She wanted to know if I was moving on,” Scorpius said. “And specifically, if I was moving on with you.”

“What did you tell her?” Rose asked, feeling hope bubble up inside her that maybe, just maybe, he had told Mila about them. Although it wasn’t the public relationship she wanted, if he had told Mila then maybe that would mean that he would eventually open up to telling everyone.

“I told her nothing was happening, of course,” Scorpius said. “Telling her would ruin the point of keeping this quiet.”

Rose nodded, avoiding his eyes to hide her disappointment.

“Hey,” Scorpius said, reaching out to pull her closer. “Are you okay?”

Rose shrugged. “I don’t know. It would be nice if we didn’t have to keep this quiet so that rumors didn’t spread about you and Mila getting back together.”

Scorpius swallowed, a guilty look passing through his face before he returned to his ever-neutral expression.

“I know,” he said quietly. “I’m sure that’s hard for you. I don’t love it myself.”

“Yeah but it’s easier for you. No one spreads rumors about me,” Rose said.

Scorpius gave her a look as if he was holding something back before he clearly decided against saying anything.

“Well that’s not true,” Scorpius said, giving her a little smirk. “I heard a rumor that you enjoy kissing boys in broom closets.”

Rose couldn’t help but let out a breath at his tone. “Only one boy and I would much rather kiss him outside of the broom closet.”

Scorpius gave her a sad smile before pulling her into a hug, pushing his face into the crook of her neck. Rose wrapped her arms around him, trying to remind herself that this is why she was willing to be a secret, because of how he made her feel, the almost drug like high that he gave her.

But at that moment, in his arms, the high felt as if it was dwindling.

Rose closed her eyes, inhaling him.

Scorpius placed small kisses on her neck, working his way up to her ear.

“You smell great,” Scorpius whispered in her ear between kisses. “New perfume?”

“Yeah,” Rose said, feeling slightly dizzy from how he sucked on her earlobe. “I got it for Christmas from Graham.”

At Graham’s name, Scorpius stopped moving his mouth, pulling back from her slightly.

“Oh,” He said, standing up to his full height again. “Well it smells nice.”

Rose frowned, unable to miss the jealous undertone of Scorpius’s voice.

“Hey, let’s skip class today,” Scorpius said. “Maybe sneak down to Hogsmeade? Spend the day there?”

Rose frowned at him, confused by suggestion.

“Why would we go to Hogsmeade?” Rose asked. “There’s a weekend in two weeks.”

“Yeah but it’s not like we can go to that one together,” Scorpius said, causing Rose to deflate. “So, let’s go now.”

“We have class,” Rose said evenly.

“Yeah but fuck it,” Scorpius said. “I don’t care about that; I just care about you.”

Rose sighed, giving Scorpius a look. Something about his voice, the intensity of it maybe, made her feel like he was trying to use this day at Hogsmeade to overcompensate for something. Maybe for the rumors she had to deal with about him and Mila. Maybe because he felt her unhappiness with keeping it a secret. But Rose couldn’t shake the feeling that it also had something to do with Graham.

“We have to go to class, Scorp,” Rose said. “It’s our N.E.W.T. year. If we want to be successful—”

“Rose can you tone down the brainiac thing just a little bit? I’m trying to have fun with you,” Scorpius said. “Merlin, you could think about something besides studying every once in a while, and actually have fun for once.”

Rose took a step back from him, feeling as if he had just slapped her. Scorpius looked down at her, clearly realizing his mistake.

“Rose I didn’t—”

“I’m going to go,” Rose said, quietly. She pushed the door open, walking away from him, ignoring how he called out for her.

* * *

Scorpius sat in Charms later that day, trying his hardest not to watch Rose and try to get her attention. She hadn’t spoken to him, had barely even looked at him, since that morning, when he called her a brainiac. While it wasn’t meant as an insult, Scorpius knew that Rose was sensitive about her study habits and got upset when people teased her for it. Hell, _he_ got mad when people teased her for her study habits and love of school. It was one of his favorite things about her.

And he had thrown it back in her face when she didn’t want to skip classes with him. Something that, in hindsight, he knew she would never agree too.

But for some reason when he heard that she was wearing a perfume that Graham got her, he snapped. Since he saw Taylor interact with Rose the summer before, he knew that Taylor fancied Rose. And that fact got even more obvious when they were at school and he was around Rose all the time.

Meanwhile Scorpius couldn’t even get within three feet of Rose without people starting to whisper, thanks to Skeeter’s article.

His response to Rose saying her perfume was from Graham probably also had to do with the fact that what Mila said to him on Saturday hadn’t left his head. Although Scorpius knew that what Mila said wasn’t true, Rose wasn’t shagging Graham Taylor, she barely even could tell that he fancied her, it didn’t help Scorpius’s jealousy at all.

Scorpius glanced up at Rose, feeling his jaw lock at the sight he saw.

Rose was sitting next to Graham, actively taking notes and listening to everything Flitwick said. Graham on the other hand was leaned back, an arm around Rose’s chair, something Scorpius was sure Rose didn’t notice.

But Scorpius noticed. And it drove him nuts.

Because Scorpius should have been the one with his arm around her chair. He should have been the one the was clearly marking her as his. It was him that Rose was spending her nights with, not Graham Taylor, but Taylor seemed to think that he had a chance with Rose.

And that fact made Scorpius almost say “fuck it” to his want of privacy with Rose and have a public relationship with her.

But all it took was one glance at Mila to remember why he wanted that privacy. His relationship with Mila was torn to shreds by the lack of privacy with everyone thinking that they knew things about their relationship when they didn’t. It was what made Mila so worried about how their relationship looked from the outside that she had started overanalyzing everything in their relationship and blowing it up.

Scorpius didn’t want that with Rose. He didn’t want that _for_ Rose.

“Mate, if you want me to believe you don’t fancy my cousin, you’re doing a bad job of it,” Al said from beside him in a hushed voice.

“What?” Scorpius asked.

“You keep staring at her,” Al said, putting his book in his bag. He hesitated, clearly debating on asking something before deciding to go for it. “Are you two…is everything okay between you two?”

Scorpius looked at Al, who was avoiding his eyes, and realized that Al knew that he and Rose were together, but was waiting for one of them to confirm it. Scorpius suddenly felt guilty, lying to Al for so long about how he felt about his cousin.

“We had a fight,” Scorpius said. “I said something stupid and now she’s upset.”

“It happens,” Al said. He and Scorpius looked back over at Rose who was stuffing the books into her bag. “You guys will be okay.”

They watched as Graham grabbed Rose’s bag, slinging it over his shoulder, offering to carry it for her. Both Scorpius and Al frowned at this, as they saw Rose nod with an unsure look on her face.

“Merlin, he’s obvious,” Albus said before looking at Scorpius. “Want me to go run interference with Taylor so you can talk to Rose?”

“You’d do that?” Scorpius asked.

Albus shrugged. “I mean, may as well. You’re annoying when you’re all broody.”

“Thanks,” Scorpius said as he got up, following Albus out of the classroom towards Graham and Rose.

“Graham! Why are you carrying my cousin’s stuff? Let me get that,” Albus said, grabbing Rose’s bag off of Graham’s shoulder. Graham was about to protest but before he could, Al had put the bag back on Rose’s shoulder. “Speaking of, I need to talk to you about something. Can you come with me to the library?”

“Um, sure,” Graham said, following Al with a confused expression. “Bye Rose.”

“Bye,” Rose said, before turning towards Scorpius. “Did Al plan this?”

“What makes you say that?” Scorpius asked.

“Because all his plans for getting people to talk involve him pulling other people away for no real reason,” Rose said, looking after Graham and Al as they walked away. “Of course, by the time they get to the library, Al will have thought of some subject that Graham needs to explain in detail for him, most likely something involving hippogriffs.”

“Hippogriffs?”

Rose nodded. “For some reason that is always Al’s go to when trying to hold someone’s attention. Unfortunately for him, Graham actually knows a lot about them and could be talking his ear off for a while.”

Scorpius chuckled at that. Rose gave him a tight smile, before looking back after Graham.

“Can we talk?” Scorpius asked, pulling Rose’s attention back to him.

“Yeah,” Rose said. “We should probably find a quieter place.”

She led them towards an alcove behind a tapestry and leaned against the wall, placing her bag on the ground. Scorpius stood opposite of her, looking down at her book bag.

“How do you not have back problems from carrying that thing?” Scorpius asked.

Rose shrugged. “I’m used to it. Being a brainiac means carrying a lot of books.”

Scorpius’s face flushed at her words.

“Rose, I’m so sorry,” Scorpius said, guilt evident in his voice. “I shouldn’t have said that.”

“It’s nothing that no one else hasn’t said,” Rose said quietly. “If anything, you asking me to tone down the brainiac thing was nothing compared to what other people call me.”

“It still wasn’t okay though,” Scorpius said. He took a step closer to her, reaching out and holding her hands in his. “I don’t want you to tone down the brainiac thing. It’s one of the things I love most about you. I was just…frustrated and wanted to spend time with you.”

“We could spend time together,” Rose said softly. “We could always go to Hogsmeade together. Even just as friends.”

Scorpius sighed, debating. “I don’t know. All it took was you touching my arm to launch an article that stated we were sneaking around for months. Who knows what being at Hogsmeade together would do?”

Rose nodded, though Scorpius could tell she wasn’t happy with his response.

“Do you want me to come on your rounds tonight?” Scorpius asked.

Rose shook her head. “I…I think I need to do them alone.”

“Okay,” Scorpius said, not liking how Rose avoided looking at him.

“I have to go,” Rose said quietly. She reached up, kissing him lightly on the lips.

Scorpius pushed against her, kissing her harder, trying to make the moment last, but Rose pulled away. Scorpius rested his head on her forehead.

“I love you,” Rose whispered.

“I love you too,” Scorpius said. “Can you meet me Wednesday night? In the Astronomy Tower?”

Rose bit her lip, almost as if she was unsure.

“Please?” Scorpius said quietly.

Rose nodded, giving him another kiss.

“Does 10 work?” Rose asked.

“Yeah,” Scorpius said. “I’ll see you then.”

* * *

When Wednesday came, Rose felt nervous the whole day. She and Scorpius hadn’t spoken since they met after Charms on Monday and she couldn’t help but feel off all day.

“You okay, Rosie?” Inez asked her Wednesday evening as they played Wizard Chess.

“Yeah, just tired,” Rose said. “I have to go do patrols at 10.”

“Oh, the life of Head Girl,” Inez said with a smile. “I will probably be up when you get back working on my Herbology essay.” Inez moved a chess piece. “Check mate.”

Rose sighed. “I don’t know why I even play with you.”

“Because it’s fun,” Inez said. “Are you really okay? I feel like you’ve been off since this weekend.”

“I’m fine,” Rose said, giving Inez a small smile.

“Are you sure?” Inez asked. She bit her lip. “Because I heard…something about you.”

Rose frowned. “What did you hear?”

“Well, I heard two things,” Inez said. “One that I absolutely don’t believe and one that I could…maybe see.”

“What are they?”

“Well…they both are about you hooking up with someone,” Inez said. “But the people are…interesting choices.”

Rose couldn’t help but chuckle. “This isn’t another rumor about someone snogging a portrait is it?”

“No,” Inez said. “I heard from a Slytherin that people were saying you were hooking up with Scorpius Malfoy. And I heard from Mila you were hooking up with Graham.”

Rose paled hearing both of those rumors.

“Obviously the idea of you and Malfoy is nuts since you barely talk unless you both are with Al but you and Graham…makes more sense,” Inez said, picking up a chess piece and fiddling with it. “And I was just wondering if there was any truth to the rumors.”

Rose watched Inez, who was normally very bubbly when talking about gossip, but was clearly uncomfortable with this topic.

“Well those are both interesting rumors,” Rose said, taking them in. “I see that people have gotten bored if they are starting to including me in rumors.”

Inez looked at her. “So, there’s no truth to them?”

Rose shook her head. “Nope.”

“That’s what I thought,” Inez said, with a smile that Rose would almost call relieved. “I don’t exactly have you pegged for a secret relationship person.”

Rose gave a tight smile, knowing Inez was right.

She wasn’t a secret relationship person.

“Hey, it’s almost 10,” Inez said. Rose looked at the clock, grabbing her coat as she stood up. “Have a good patrol.”

“Good luck with your Herbology work,” Rose said, giving a wave. Before she walked out of the Common Room.

As she walked, she was so focused on zipping her coat that she ran right into someone. She felt herself start to stumble when they grabbed her elbows to steady here.

“Where are you going, Rose?” Graham asked, his hands warm on her arms.

“Oh, I have patrol,” Rose said, stepping out of Graham’s reach.

Since Saturday, when he had interrupted her conversation with Mila, he had been much more…affectionate than normal. To the point where it was, clearly, beyond friendship. He had held her book bag for her, sat next to her constantly, putting his arm around her chair and letting his fingers brush against her shoulder in an affectionate way.

And, despite Rose not having romantic feelings for Graham, she found that she liked that he was so affectionate with her.

“Again? Damn your boss is really working you hard,” Graham said with a smirk.

Rose smiled back. “Well, I’ll see you later—”

“Are you going to Hogsmeade next week?” Graham asked her.

“Yeah,” Rose said, bouncing on the balls of her feet, ready to leave.

“Well, would you um, maybe um—”

“Graham, I’m really sorry but I have to go,” Rose said, looking at her watch. She had two minutes to get to the Astronomy Tower. “Can this wait until tomorrow?”

Graham deflated slightly. “Yeah sure.”

Rose gave him a quick smile before running off towards the tower, anxious to meet Scorpius.

By the time she had gotten there, she was a few minutes late. She ran up the steps, opening the door and shutting it behind her quickly, scanning the room for Scorpius.

She didn’t see Scorpius though. She did however see a blanket laid out with pillows on it, facing the stars, a telescope next to it.

“Surprise,” Scorpius said, from behind her, wrapping his arms around her middle from behind.

She turned her head to look at him. “What is this?”

“I thought we could star gaze,” Scorpius said, placing a small kiss on her cheek. “It’s February 1st. We kissed for the first time 6 months ago.”

Rose gaped at him, shocked that he remembered the date when she didn’t and also that he did this for her.

“I thought that we could watch the stars and you could tell me facts about them,” Scorpius said. “Because I love your bookishness and how much you love to study and know. I love everything about you. And I’m sorry that I made you think otherwise.”

Rose looked at Scorpius, suddenly feeling as though everything, being a secret, dealing with rumors about him with someone else, was suddenly worth it.

She couldn’t have felt more in love with him than at that moment.

She turned in his arms, placing her hands around his neck.

“And what are the pillows for?” she asked, a suggestive tone in her voice.

“I thought maybe after we star gazed, we could snog a bit,” Scorpius said with a smirk.

Rose stood on her tip toes, kissing him lightly.

“I think we can do more than snog,” Rose whispered, before capturing Scorpius’s lips with her own.

Scorpius was all too happy to respond, pulling her closer and starting to unzip her jacket, tossing it aside as they moved backwards towards the blanket. Rose started pulling Scorpius’s shirt up, wanting it off, feeling grateful when her hands felt his skin. His hands work quickly, taking off her shirt as well before Rose started kissing down his chest, lowering herself to the ground. It wasn’t long before Scorpius joined her on the ground, his body over hers.

The high that Rose had thought was dwindling was back, full force, and she couldn’t help but want _more_ of Scorpius. That feeling wasn’t satisfied until Scorpius was inside her, her legs wrapped around him trying to pull him closer, _deeper_ , until they both lost themselves in the high.

* * *

“You see that one there?” Rose asked pointing at the bright star in the sky. She was resting between his legs, his arms around her, holding her close.

“Mhm,” Scorpius said, looking at where Rose was pointing.

“That’s Venus,” Rose said. “On certain nights you can see it but not always.”

“Why did you stop taking Astronomy again?” Scorpius asked. “You’ve talked for the last hour to me about constellations and planets.”

“It didn’t fit into my schedule, especially with all the Healer classes I needed to take to qualify for the apprenticeship,” Rose said. “Why didn’t you take it?”

“Because I got a P on my O.W.L,” Scorpius said.

“You got a P?” Rose asked, looking back at him in shock. “How on earth did you manage that?”

Scorpius smirked. “My mum asked the same thing.”

Rose leaned into him, resting her hands against his legs.

“How are you doing with that?” she asked.

“Some days are better than others,” Scorpius said quietly, resting his head on hers. “I’m still not sleeping well; I’m lucky if I get 3 hours. But overall, I think being at Hogwarts helps because I wouldn’t see her normally. But there are things, like the fact that the letters from only say “Dad” or occasionally “Dad and Nana” that remind me.”

“Is there ever anything I can do to help?”

Scorpius shrugged. “Not really. Being around you helps. Moments like this help. But sometimes when it happens and there are a lot of people around, it’s all I can do not to just hold you until it passes, regardless of who sees.”

“You could do that,” Rose said quietly. “I wouldn’t mind if people found out about us.”

“I know,” Scorpius said. “I know you wouldn’t mind.”

A moment of silence passed over them and Scorpius felt Rose move her head to look up at the stars.

“Are you going to Hogsmeade next week?” Scorpius asked her.

“Yeah,” Rose said. “You?”

“Probably,” Scorpius said. “Who are you going to go with?”

Scorpius felt Rose deflate a little at his question.

“Probably my friends…Inez, Layla and Graham,” Rose said. “Although Graham was being weird today. I saw him before I came here and he was asking me about Hogsmeade and if I was going. He was going to ask something else but I had to leave.”

Scorpius locked his jaw. “Oh. Do you know what?”

“No,” Rose said. “I was worried I’d be late so I told him we’d talk later.”

Scorpius nodded and couldn’t help but tighten his hold on Rose.

“Did you ever think that maybe he would ask you out?” Scorpius said quietly.

“No, I never thought that before,” Rose said. “But considering how he’s been lately…I guess it’s possible.”

“Yeah he can’t seem to keep to himself,” Scorpius muttered.

Rose looked back at him with a smirk. “You jealous, Malfoy?”

“No,” Scorpius said. “Just don’t love seeing him touching you all the time.”

“Oh Scorpius,” Rose said shaking her head. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t enjoying the attention, it’s nice having someone publicly show their feelings, but I would rather it was someone else.”

Scorpius nodded, looking up at the stars.

“I mean, it would be nice to be able to not meet in secret. Not to have to lie to my friends all the time,” Rose said. “Be able to hold your hand and kiss you in public. I would be lying to myself and you if I said that didn’t sound much more appealing than keeping everything secret like this.”

Scorpius gulped at her words, worry filling his chest.

He knew Rose wanted more from him. She hadn’t been subtle about it. This was, however, the most transparent she had been about her feelings regarding that fact. Normally she just made a passing comment or got quiet and Scorpius could only assume that’s what it was about. But now, she was admitting not only to enjoying the attention from another bloke but also that she wanted someone who would be unafraid of giving her that public attention.

And Scorpius couldn’t help but wonder if he’d ever be able to give that to her.

Rose leaned further into him, kissing his arm as she did so.

“I don’t ever want to leave,” she said as she pulled his arms tighter.

Scorpius nuzzled his head against her, smelling her hair. She was wearing a perfume, but not the one that Graham had given her, one that he was sure she had borrowed from Layla. He wondered if she had done that intentionally after what happened on Monday.

He too, never wanted to leave. Because he was starting to wonder how much longer she would stay with him if he kept their relationship a secret.

* * *

Rose was on a high for the next two days after her night with Scorpius. The night between them almost felt like summer again, where it was just the two of them, no outside interferences. She had forgotten about the need for privacy and the rumors about Graham and Mila and everything, instead focusing only on Scorpius and their relationship.

Even as she was studying on Friday afternoon, she couldn’t help but smile at the thought of stargazing with him. It was such a nice change to actually be doing something together, instead of hiding in classrooms or broom cupboards. It made her forget the secret maneuvers they had to take with their relationship.

Like how currently, she was waiting for Scorpius in the back corner of the library, where there was a decent amount of privacy, so that they could study together. When they studied together, Scorpius liked to study where few people were, that way they didn’t have to deal with the looks people gave them and they could be slightly more affectionate.

Rose looked up when she heard someone walking towards her, expecting to see Scorpius, but her smile dropped slightly when it was Graham coming towards her instead.

“Hey Rosie,” Graham said with a smile. He pulled out a chair. “Can I sit here for a few minutes?”

“Sure,” Rose said, hesitantly.

Graham pulled out his seat and sat down across from her.

Rose smiled at him, before turning back to her books, trying to hide her disappointment that Graham was at the table with her.

“So…we never really got to finish our conversation on Wednesday,” Graham said.

Rose frowned at her paper before looking up at him, confused. Her eyes were quickly drawn behind him though, where Scorpius had turned the corner, stopping when he saw Graham at the table with her before moving into the stacks nearby, out of sight.

“What conversation?” Rose asked him.

Graham laughed. “Wow you sure know how to make a guy feel important.”

Rose’s eyes glanced past him, hoping for a glimpse of Scorpius but was unable to see him.

“Right,” Rose said.

“We were talking about Hogsmeade,” Graham said. “And I asked if you were going to go.”

“Oh yeah, of course,” Rose said. “Yeah I’m planning on going. Why?”

“Well,” Graham said and Rose could tell that he was nervous.

A sense of dread came over Rose as she remembered Scorpius asking if she thought that Graham might have wanted to ask her out. She knew that she hadn’t been doing a lot to discourage him in regards to the amount of attention he had been giving her, but she had hoped that he wasn’t doing all those things because he actually fancied her.

“I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go to Hogsmeade with me,” Graham said as Rose’s stomach dropped. “As a date.”

“Oh,” Rose said. “Graham, I…I appreciate you asking. I’m very flattered, in fact. But we…we’re friends. And I don’t really want to ruin that right now.”

Graham nodded. “I understand. But you said right now? Perhaps someday in the future then you’ll feel like ruining this?”

Rose chuckled, feeling uncomfortable. “Sure. Maybe someday in the future.”

“Alright,” Graham said, standing up. “Well, I’m going to take my bruised ego back to the Common Room. Are you going to stay and study?”

“Yeah,” Rose said. “I have a study schedule to stick to.”

“Of course,” Graham said. “See you later Rosie.”

“Bye,” Rose said.

She watched him walk away, feeling grateful he didn’t stick around. Rose stood up once he was out of sight, walking towards the row of books that she saw Scorpius disappear into when he saw Graham.

She looked down and saw him standing there with a book in hand, pretending to read.

“Hey,” she said as she walked towards him. “I was wondering where you went.”

“Well you found me,” Scorpius said, his tone flat.

Rose frowned at him. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, just.... not a fan of what I just heard,” Scorpius said.

Rose sighed and wrapped her arms around his middle in a hug.

“You know there’s only one person I want to go on a date to Hogsmeade with,” Rose said.

Scorpius gave her a smile, but it didn’t quite meet his eyes. He leaned down and kissed her lightly before pulling away.

“I actually need to go,” he said quietly.

“What? Why?” Rose asked confused.

“Declan needed help with something and I said I would help him,” Scorpius said, easily.

Rose however, could tell that Scorpius was lying. She could tell that while he was pretending that everything was fine, that things were far from it.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Rose asked. “I’m sorry Graham asked me out—”

“Rose you don’t need to apologize for that,” Scorpius said, rubbing her arm. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Okay,” Rose said, still feeling confused.

Scorpius leaned in, kissing her, pulling her against him. He pulled back, resting his head against hers with his eyes still closed.

“I really love you,” Scorpius said quietly.

Rose looked up at him questioningly, but found that his eyes remained closed.

“I love you too,” She whispered back.

“I’ll see you later,” Scorpius said, before kissing her forehead one more time and letting her go.

Rose watched him walk away, having a feeling she hoped she wouldn’t feel again suddenly return.

Everything about their interaction felt final. She had felt it once before, last summer, before she and Scorpius broke it off. He had been the same way; distant, not really interacting with her, saying how he felt about her as if it was goodbye.

Rose rubbed her hands together, feeling anxiety build, overtaking the high that she had been riding for the past two days.

All she could do at that point was hope she was wrong. Hope that he wasn’t bailing.

Hope that he still wanted her.

* * *

Scorpius walked out of the library, his stomach in knots.

He knew how Graham felt about Rose. That wasn’t a surprise. That wasn’t that part that had his head spinning.

The part that had his head spinning was Rose telling Graham that maybe in the future they’d be together.

Scorpius, who had been standing in a row of books nearby, waiting for Taylor to leave so he could get onto his study date with Rose, nearly dropped his book when he heard that. Because he couldn’t help wondering what exactly that meant for his and Rose’s relationship.

Was Scorpius just a detour for Rose until she ended up with Graham? Did Rose have real, genuine feelings for Graham and was sewing all her wild oats until she was ready to commit to him?

She had admitted that she liked the attention from Graham. She had admitted that she wanted a public relationship. And now Graham was offering it to her on a silver platter.

How much longer would she stay with Scorpius when she could have had everything she wanted easily? How much longer would she be with Scorpius before she dumped him for Graham?

How much longer was he going to wait until she changed her mind?

Scorpius felt a hand on his shoulder, pulling him back to reality.

“Hey,” Mila said, looking at him. “Are you okay?”

They hadn’t spoken since their argument nearly a week ago. He knew that Mila felt bad, giving him all her telltale signs that she wanted to talk like trying to get him alone, but he had avoided her.

Now though, she had stopped him in the hallway by the Defense classrooms, a hand on his shoulder, giving him a concerned look, similar to the ones she gave him when she came over after his mum died.

And Scorpius decided he wasn’t going to wait for Rose to change her mind.

“Yeah,” Scorpius said, giving Mila an easy grin. “Actually, you’re just the person I was looking for.”

Mila gave him a questioning look before he grabbed her hand, pulling her into the nearest Defense classroom and slamming his lips against hers.

* * *

Rose sat in the Ravenclaw Common Room in her sweats, staring into the fire. She had a book in front of her, but found that she had trouble focusing on it, her mind reeling from the complete turn of emotions Scorpius had given her.

How could someone make her feel so high and then immediately drag her down?

Rose sighed, looking around the Common Room. Layla was at Quidditch practice as she was seeker on the team, while Graham was Keeper. Rose was sure that Layla was having them run drills, since the match between Ravenclaw and Slytherin was coming up in March.

Inez walked in then, waving at Rose and coming to sit next to her on the couch.

“I see we are spending Friday night in cozy attire,” Inez said.

“Of course, is there another way?” Rose asked. She offered Inez part of the blanket that Rose currently had and Inez wiggled her feet under it. “We could be like our silly friends and play Quidditch.”

“Ah, but we are the smarter two of the four of us,” Inez said, with a smirk. “Have you seen them today outside of classes?”

“Layla not since this morning and Graham found me in the library,” Rose said. “He um, he asked me to Hogsmeade.”

Inez took a in a breath. “He did?”

Rose nodded.

“What did you say?” Inez asked, biting her lip slightly.

“I said no,” Rose said. “We’re too good of friends. I don’t want to mess that up.”

“Makes sense,” Inez said picking at the blanket. She frowned as she looked down. “Do you fancy him at all?”

“No,” Rose responded. “He’s my friend that’s it.”

“Right,” Inez said. “Right.”

Rose frowned at Inez’s responses. Normally, Inez would have been pressing for more information, asking Rose if she was s _ure_ she didn’t like Graham, that there was absolutely no small part of her that was attracted to him at all. Rose knew this, based on the many times that Inez had done just that when Rose would be partnered with a bloke for class or a boy would flirt with her or, in the very rare cases, when a bloke would actually ask her out. But now Inez seemed uncomfortable, much to Rose’s confusion.

“Where were you?” Rose asked, changing the topic. “I looked for you at dinner and couldn’t find you.”

“Oh, I was with Mila,” Inez said. She looked up; her face bright with what Rose knew meant that she had gossip. “Oh Merlin, Rose you won’t believe—”

Inez cut herself off, taking a deep breath before starting over.

“I was with Mila,” Inez said. “And I want to tell you why but I feel like I shouldn’t.”

“You don’t have to tell me anything,” Rose said with a laugh. “I understand the cousin relationship and that secrets have to be kept.”

Inez gave her a tight-lipped smile. “It’s really good gossip though.”

“I’m not going to force it out of you,” Rose said. “If you want to tell me, tell me but I also understand if not.”

Inez moved closer to Rose, clearly debating with herself.

“Okay, I’ll tell you,” Inez said. “But you promise not to tell anyone?”

“Of course,” Rose said, sitting up slightly with a grin.

“Well,” Inez said, her voice low. “Mila told me…Mila told me that she and Scorpius hooked up today!”

Rose felt her heart drop out of her chest.

“…what?” Rose asked, barely able to get the word out.

“Mila said she ran into Scorpius this afternoon and that he was acting weird so she asked if he was okay…and then he pulled her into a Defense Classroom and they hooked up!”

“Wh—what do you mean they hooked up?” Rose said, feeling her heart beat a hundred miles a minute as she tried to piece everything together. “Did they—did they shag?”

“No,” Inez said and even though Rose felt as though she was living a nightmare, a small wave of relief came over her. “They didn’t shag. Mila said they were close though. She said they snogged and that things were intense but when she tried to take his shirt off, he just pulled away and left, no explanation.”

Rose nodded, unsure of what else to do as she tried to keep her expression neutral.

“Isn’t that weird?” Inez said. “They get into a huge fight on Saturday, ignore each other all week, and then this happens. Mila is so confused by what’s going on with him.”

Rose looked down at her book, feeling a kinship to Mila in that moment. She too was confused by what was going on with Scorpius.

“I have to go,” Rose said, suddenly.

Inez gave her a confused look. “Are you okay Rose? You look pale.”

“Yeah, I just…I forgot I need to ask Al something,” Rose said, trying to keep her voice steady. “I’ll see you later.”

“Okay?” Inez said. “Bye.”

Rose felt Inez’s eyes on her as she left, her friend confused by her sudden departure.

Rose wasn’t sure where she was going. Her legs were guiding her down towards the dungeon as if they moved on her own, her mind completely swimming with confusion as to what was happening.

Why would Scorpius kiss Mila? He had just told Rose today how much he loved her. Why would he then go and cheat on her with his ex-girlfriend?

Rose felt nauseous.

Rose made it to the dungeons, standing outside the Slytherin Common Room and suddenly realized she didn’t have a plan. She didn’t know what she was doing. All she knew is that she needed to talk to Scorpius.

She was about to see if she could somehow trick her way into the Common Room, thinking it was like the Ravenclaw tower where they had to answer a riddle, when the door suddenly opened and Scorpius wandered out.

He stopped walking when he saw her, his face completely blank, before nodding to the side and walking towards the Potions corridor. Rose followed him into an old Potions room, feeling a sick when she noticed that it was Potions Room 4, the same room where he told her that he wanted to keep their relationship a secret.

Scorpius sat on a desk and looked at her.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, his tone flat.

If he was being honest, Scorpius hadn’t expected to see Rose that night. He had been wracked with guilt since he left Mila in the Defense room, confused with her shirt undone, but knew that he had done enough to get the message across that he wasn’t waiting for Rose to realize he wasn’t enough for her.

“What do you mean, what am I doing here?” Rose asked, her voice breaking slightly. “Do you have something you need to tell me?”

Scorpius shrugged, choosing to handle this the way he used to handle fights with Mila when he was in the wrong by completely cutting off all emotions.

“Not really,” he said, nonchalantly. “Didn’t get a chance to finish my Charms essay today.”

“I’m not surprised,” Rose said, her tone biting. “Considering you were snogging your ex-girlfriend a few hours ago.”

“Ah,” Scorpius said. “That.”

Rose blanked at him, confused by his lack of emotions.

“Do you have anything to say about it?” Rose asked him. “Explain why it happened, apologize? Anything?”

“Not really,” Scorpius said. He gritted his teeth when he saw her eyes start to well with tears.

Rose let out a breath, trying to keep her composure. She wanted to scream at him. It was bad enough that he did this, that he caused her all this pain but to act so…cold was something else.

“So, you’re not sorry?” Rose said, unable to hold the tears back anymore. “You’re not sorry that you cheated on me? That you ruined this?”

Rose saw something flash through Scorpius’s eyes before he looked away from her, almost as if he didn’t want to watch her. Her anger built up inside of her and suddenly she couldn’t keep it in anymore.

“Merlin, look at the mess you made me!” Rose said, crying. Scorpius closed his eyes, trying to keep his composure. “You did this!”

Rose looked at him, waiting for him to say something, anything, or even look at her, but instead he sat there, his head sideways and eyes closed.

She felt so confused. She felt used. But more than anything, she felt stupid. And that was possibly the worst part.

“I feel like such an idiot,” Rose said quietly. “You made me feel like such an idiotic fool…was this why you wanted to keep us private? So that you could run back to Mila easily? So that your humiliation of me wouldn’t be public and you could keep your reputation?”

“Rose…” Scorpius said, but he didn’t know what to say. She was right. He had done everything and in trying to make himself not feel like option, he had made Rose feel stupid, something he knew she must have hated.

Scorpius looked up at Rose then, her eyes fierce, her hair up in a loose bun, looking completely unkept. Scorpius wanted nothing more in that moment than to take all of it back, explain why he did it, but looking at what he did to her, how he made her feel, he suddenly realized that wasn’t an option.

He didn’t want to just be a stopping point for Rose on her journey to Graham.

So, he pushed all his emotions back, putting on the asshole façade he knew how to play all too well from fights with Mila.

“I mean did you really see this going anywhere?” Scorpius asked, his voice dry. “Maybe if this was really serious then it’d be different. But this was just…a fling.”

He had a flash back to when Rose told him the same thing, that they were just a fling all those months earlier. Then he had felt a stab in his chest at her words, at realizing that their relationship must not have meant as much to her as it meant to him.

He could only imagine that was what was going through Rose’s head now.

Rose sucked in a breath. “A fling?”

Scorpius nodded, fighting against the part of himself telling him to stop this and be with her, even if he was just a pit stop until she was ready for something more serious for Graham.

“Okay then,” Rose said, wiping her eyes with her sleeve. “Well fine. But this is done.”

Rose turned around, slamming the door behind her but not before a sob escaped her.

Scorpius sat on the desk, his eyes falling, before he pulled himself off the desk and sat on the ground. He ran his hands through his hair, pulling on it, as he truly realized all that he had done in a span of a few hours.

He had ruined everything. The past month and a half of his life had turned completely upside down when he lost of mum and he felt like nothing would ever be alright again. He felt like _he_ would never be alright again. But then Rose came back into his life. And she made him realize that things would be okay again, one day, even if his mum wasn’t there anymore.

And now he ruined it.

He knew why he did it though. He couldn’t give Rose what she wanted. So, he purposefully kissed Mila, knowing it would get back to Rose through Inez. Knowing that it would ruin everything they had built.

He put his head in his hands, trying to regain his breath, knowing that he hadn’t just ruined what they built. Knowing that he hadn’t just ruined his reminder that things were going to be okay without his mum. That he hadn’t just hurt the girl he loved more than could be forgiven.

He had ruined himself too.

But as he sat there, feeling the pain of the loss of Rose in his life he realized something.

If Rose getting what she wanted, what he couldn’t give her, was at the cost of him ruining himself, he would ruin himself a million little times.

He just wanted Rose to be happy.

Even if it wasn’t with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I am working hard on Part 3...any guesses as to which folklore song it's based off of?
> 
> Let me know what you thought! If you enjoyed, please comment and leave a kudos! If you're able to subscribe to the series please do so, so that you don't miss when part 3 comes out!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Please subscribe so you get alerted when the new chapter comes out, leave a kudos and comment if you liked it and your thoughts, and check out some of my other stories!


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